Attack of the 60 Foot Centerfold Reviews

The title is the most entertaining part of this Fred Olen Ray production, a harmless but inconsequential direct-to-video B movie about two overly large female antagonists. Mr. Gordon (Jay Richardson), publisher of Plaything magazine, is about to choose the Centerfold of the Year, and invites the three contestants, Angel (J.J. North), Inga (Raelyn Saalman), and the bitchy Betty (Tammy Parks), to his mansion to determine the winner. Insecure about how she will size up, Angel has been secretly taking a formula created by Dr. Paul Lindstrom (John LaZar) to improve her measurements and, on the eve of the contest, drinks an overdose of it. The next morning, she is 60 feet tall, and Mr. Gordon quickly determines she will be "the biggest centerfold ever." Jealous that Angel has beaten her, Betty drinks some of the formula herself, and soon there is a monstrous catfight underway on the streets of Los Angeles. Dr. Lindstrom, alerted by the photographer's assistant Wilson (Ted Monte), arrives with an antidote, reducing Angel and Betty back to normal size and restoring Angel to Wilson's arms. With the original ATTACK OF THE 50 FOOT WOMAN having been remade as a cable production with Daryl Hannah in 1993, it was only a matter of time before some enterprising second grade filmmaker undertook this variation. It is also no surprise that the one who did so was Ray, whose productions often evince an appreciation of 50s genre films. But beyond the basic story variation, there is little in the way of imagination in evidence here. In its own way, it conforms as much to the standards of its time as the original 50 FOOT WOMAN did in its own--only here the humor is intentional. Ray and writer Steve Armogida drop in a few mild in-jokes and a couple of moments of Zucker Brothers-style wackiness, with plenty of topless nudity from the attractive female cast but little real action. The result is a film that is neither especially daring nor unduly restrained, neither slavishly formula-bound nor particularly creative, neither grossly prurient nor genuinely arousing. (Extensive nudity, sexual situations, profanity.)