Ski Patrol Reviews

SKI PATROL is the latest entry in the seemingly endless list of brainless slapstick comedies that include PORKY'S and POLICE ACADEMY (which shares this film's producer). Set at the Snowy Peaks ski lodge and its surrounding slopes, SKI PATROL follows the zany adventures of the bunch of lovable misfits that patrol the area. Led by the charismatic Jerry (Roger Rose), the group is all set to celebrate Snowy Peaks' 40th anniversary when trouble rears its ugly head in the form of evil real estate baron Maris (Martin Mull). It seems that Maris wants to take Snowy Peaks away from lovable old Pops (Ray Walston), the resort's owner, and that he will use any devious means necessary to attain this objective. These include hiring the evil Lance (Corby Timbrook) and his friends--sworn enemies of the ski patrol--to sabotage the slopes and make the patrol look bad in an effort to force Snowy Peaks to close. The ski patrol has other worries, though, like passing the difficult tests (which include tortuous maneuvering through caves and down elaborate slopes) required to earn their badges as patrolmen. The gang must also keep an eye out for a schizophrenic daredevil named Suicide (Sean Gregory Sullivan), who flies down the slopes on one ski. And, of course, they have to find the time for those all-important practical jokes. Other patrol antics include the efforts of Stanley (Paul Feig) to overcome his clumsiness and impress an attractive foreign exchange student, while Jerry tries to rekindle a romance with Pop's niece (Yvette Nipar) and two other squad members enter a talent contest to get yet another patrolman out of jail. Meanwhile, the bad guys sabotage snowmobiles and drop mice on people, which eventually forces Pops to sell his property to Maris. Never fear, however; our wacky heroes come through with flying skis in the end. SKI PATROL is lame-brained entertainment stuffed with tired gags and stale slapstick. Scraping the bottom of the barrel for its desperate laughs, the film serves up fat jokes, short jokes (one of which is stolen from "The Brady Bunch," of all places), breast jokes, nerd jokes, and dog jokes--as well as countless pratfalls and stumbles. All the characters exhibit the kind of idiocy it takes to inhabit the genre, and the plot is recycled from every formula comedy of the past 10 years (in fact, it's a virtual remake of CADDYSHACK). This would not be so bad if some of the gags were even remotely funny, but none of them are. The stupidest moments include a short man tripping over a slobbering bulldog (the same bulldog is also used in a joke blatantly stolen from USED CARS), a woman being thrown into a cake, and another character being soaked in hot dog condiments. There are also slaps, punches, and crashes, several chase scenes, and, of course, the requisite man in drag. Director Richard Correll's timing is appalling; so many sight gags are mishandled that after a while it becomes depressing. Executive produced by Paul Maslansky, the self-crowned King of Slapstick responsible for all six "Police Academy" outings, SKI PATROL fits well into the "Police Academy" numbskull mold; even its star, Rose, follows in the Steve Guttenberg tradition of unbearable smugness and shallowness. Let's just hope that SKI PATROL doesn't follow too thoroughly in the footsteps of Maslansky's other films, or we might be in for a SKI PATROL 2. (Profanity, adult situations.)