ben.katner

Fallen Comic Laughs Last

On last week's Last Comic Standing, Bonnie McFarlane became the first funny person given the boot from the finalists' ha-ha hacienda. But, when talking with TV Guide Online, the California girl sounded more relieved than bereaved. Has she told so many jokes that the punch lines have left her punch-drunk? In anticipation of tonight's episode (airing at 9 pm/ET on NBC), you can read on and decide for yourself. TV Guide Online: I'll make this as quick as possible.Bonnie McFarlane: I hope so. I've got things to do. I've got rice and beans with my name on it! TVGO: Mmm... beans. On an unrelated note, John Heffron seemed to be really sweating during your head-to-head. Were you as surprised as I was that he wasn't eliminated instead of you?McFarlane: Not really. I thought I had a pretty good set, but then they took me to my dressing room — you're not allowed to watch the other person's set. But I heard the laughter. It really was

Tue, Jun 29, 2004

L&O Boss Stands Trial

It would be a crime to confuse Fox's new legal drama, The Jury, with NBC's midseason contender, Law & Order: Trial by Jury — or at least so says Dick Wolf, the creator of L&O and its umpteen spin-offs. Rumors that the latest addition to the franchise will be set entirely in the deliberation room are "absolutely incorrect," the executive producer tells TV Guide Online. "There will be one or two scenes in the fourth act every week in the jury room, but you couldn't set a [whole] show in the jury room, I don't think." However, Wolf concedes that TBJ — potentially an all-star affair featuring Jerry Orbach, Candice Bergen and Frasier dad John Mahoney — will not adhere as strictly to the time-tested L&O format as, say, SVU. "The cops are not as big as they are on L&O because it's set in the courthouse," he explains. "It's not law... it's order. The setup is a l

Mon, Jun 28, 2004

New L&O ADA: Who'd Be A-OK?

Now that Elisabeth Rohm is finally leaving her Law & Order role of Assistant District Attorney Serena Southerlyn, we are dancing in the streets. (Nothing personal, but she was always a little brittle for our taste.) And when we aren't delightedly pounding the pavement, we are dreaming up new partners in crimefighting for Sam Waterston's character, Jack McCoy. Since it's doubtful that our fondest wish will be granted — and Angie Harmon will suit up again as the best ADA ever, Abbie Carmichael — dare we hope that &uuml;berproducer Dick Wolf will consider at least briefly these other could-be (and, in some cases, have-been) lawyers? Lara Flynn Boyle: Provided that she can keep herself out of the Mary-Kate Olsen wing of her local rehab clinic, the incredible shrinking woman could use the legalese she learned as Practice prosecutor Helen Gamble to shore up the L&O cast. On sec

Fri, Jun 25, 2004

Doug Wilson Trades Up

Although interior designer Doug Wilson is the bad guy of Trading Spaces, he'll don a white hat for his role as host (and de facto grief counselor) of Movin' Up, an in-the-works TLC series in which families revisit their old homes after new owners have redecorated. Is the notoriously touchy character really prepared to get touchy-feely? "I've been in the industry for years, so I've been holding [clients'] hands forever!" he tells TV Guide Online with a laugh. "Trading Spaces was really the only forum where I didn't have to hold hands! "I'm looking forward to being a host," he adds. "I worked hard for four years [on TLC's flagship program], so it's nice to get the pat on the back and the chance to move on, move up and do other things." That said, when pressed, Wilson admits that not everything he'll be doing in his new capacity will be all that... well, new. "I'm not going to try and stir the pot too m

Thu, Jun 24, 2004

Superstar Jamie Squeals!

Last night, WB's marvelously mean-spirited American Idol parody, Superstar USA, crowned Jessica Simpson lookalike Jamie Foss its winner... meaning that she makes Britney Spears sound like Barbra Streisand. Once the buxom blond recovered from learning that her larynx is considered a lethal weapon in every state but denial (and had jokes like that one explained to her), she was ready to meet the press, starting with TV Guide Online. So, are you ready for Jamie? Read on and find out! TV Guide Online: So, Jamie, now that you know the show made a laughingstock of you, do you even want to do this interview?Jamie: Of course I do! I'm very happy with the outcome. Seriously, I do not care at all that it was a joke. This is just, like, an unbelievable experience! TVGO: Well, okay! Did you start to suspect that you were the victim of a hoax during your duet with runner-up Mario?Jamie: When I heard Mario sing, I w

Tue, Jun 15, 2004

JoJo a Superstar No Mo'!

When WB crowns (or is that "beheads"?) its Superstar USA tonight (9 pm/ET), three things are certain: 1.) Our ears will bleed. 2.) The "winner" will cry, if not from excitement, then from embarrassment. And 3.) JoJo will be sad. As the ambitious platinum blond tells TV Guide Online, he doesn't care that Tone-Loc, Vitamin C and the entire viewing audience were laughing at him; he was just happy that we were looking at him at all. TV Guide Online: How did you find out that Superstar USA had turned you into a punch line?JoJo: One of the producers called and was like, "I need to talk to you." I'm thinking, "It's just to tie up loose ends," and then he said, you know, "You were the butt of a joke." TVGO: Ouch.JoJo: To be honest with you, I laughed! I had such a fun time doing it that even though it was a joke, you know what? I still have the experience. I always had a suspicion that something was going on, but I could ne

Mon, Jun 14, 2004

O.C. Vixen Going MIA?

If Fox makes a hit of its new Hawaii-set soap, North Shore (premiering tonight at 8 pm/ET), then its other prime-time sudser, The O.C., could be missing one of its mischievous minxes when it returns in November. That's because O.C. hellion Hailey and North Shore trouble magnet Tessa are both played by Amanda Righetti, the hardest-working vamp since Heather Locklear. "I guess I'm sort of on a roll here!" Righetti tells TV Guide Online with a laugh. "I'm hoping that I can do both shows, but it's going to really depend on scheduling. It's like, 'Don't make me choose!'" Like any actress who deserves her SAG card, Righetti wants nothing more than to stretch as an artist. But for now, she doesn't mind being Fox's go-to bad girl; for all their pot-stirring, pampered Hailey and streetwise Tessa are very distinct, she says. "Tessa came from a broken home and has had to fend for herself for a lot of her life. She's found her niche i

Mon, Jun 14, 2004

Whitney Rocks Punk'd!

If you read the above headline and thought you were going to get some dish on Whitney Houston, ha! You've been punk'd! But don't blame us, blame Whitney Cummings, the fast-talking 21-year-old Ashton Kutcher recruited to bring stars down to Earth on his hit MTV prankfest (airing Sundays at 10 pm/ET). After talking with the mischievous actress about the practical jokes she's played on everyone from Julia Stiles to The Rock, we couldn't resist trying out a scam or two of our own. Besides, if you think you feel cheated, just wait until she finds out that she was being interrogated by TV Guide Online and not doing a pre-interview for Inside the Actors Studio. TV Guide Online: Which celebrity has reacted best to being punk'd?Whitney Cummings: Probably Chris Klein, as far as the most satisfying reaction. He bought it hook, line and sinker. TVGO: No, I mean who was the best sport?Cummings: Oh. In that c

Fri, Jun 11, 2004

Seven Silly Questions for... Joe Rogan

Joe Rogan is not Howard Stern... yet. But give him time. In any given week, you can catch the future king of all media on two of the tube's most polarizing programs, NBC's Fear Factor (Mondays at 8 pm/ET) and Comedy Central's The Man Show (Sundays at 10 pm/ET). Today, he's even taking over the Internet, visiting TV Guide Online to answer seven of our silliest questions ever. Can the former stand-up's conquest of Paris Hilton, UPN and the world be far behind? TV Guide Online: Since men are such notorious channel surfers, is The Man Show doomed simply because its title aims to attract this fickle demographic?Joe Rogan: We counter that problem by featuring many young girls with bags of saline stuffed into the skin beneath their nipples. I know it sounds weird, but it actually works. TVGO: Care to address the rumor that you only allow Doug Stanhope to continue on as your co-host because you think he's less handsome than

Thu, Jun 10, 2004

No Swan Song for Nina Diva!

We felt bad when Superstar USA gave the boot to kicky contestant Nina Diva last week. Although we'd sooner buy a CD of fingernails on a chalkboard than ever again hear her maul "Roxanne," the Orlando-based Korean-American entertainer truly believed she'd just blown her shot at being the next Britney. And when we thought about her reaction upon learning that the show (continuing on WB tonight at 9 pm/ET) was an American Idol parody designed to unearth the next William Hung, not the next Ruben Studdard, we felt even worse. So we checked out ninadiva.com to hear whether her confidence in her abilities was completely unfounded. (It isn't; Christina, she ain't, but after a few cocktails, she could get us out on the dance floor.) Then we rang up the former NFL cheerleader to let her get in a few more kicks — this time aimed at the reality competition that had invited us to delight in her humiliation. TV Guide Online: How

Mon, Jun 7, 2004

Bratt's the Cat's Meow

Benjamin Bratt may be Halle Berry's official scratching post in the upcoming Catwoman feature film, but she wasn't the only cast member he made purr. Turns out Mad TV grad Alex Borstein, who plays Berry's bosom buddy in the movie, also wanted to sink her claws into the former Law & Order hunk! The funny lady's desire to lap up Talisa Soto's husband began years ago, when she was interviewing celebrities for the Fox skitcom. "I embarrassed him on the red carpet," Borstein confesses to TV Guide Online. "He's one of the few male celebrities that when I saw him coming  I think it was at the VH1 Awards  I genuinely melted a bit, like, 'He is really, really cute!' So I just kind of made a [fool] out of myself and maybe jumped on him or something." Getting all co-starstruck would have been humiliating enough for the actress, currently at work on a big-screen adaptation of beloved

Thu, Jun 3, 2004

Swan Spreads Her Wings

This time last year, Rachel Love-Fraser was a dumpy newlywed working at a Washington construction company. And today? She's The Swan, the ultraglamorous winner of Fox's formerly plain Jane beauty pageant. Has success — and a buxom bod that underwent more plastic surgery than an entire Hooters waitstaff — gone to her pretty red head? To find out, TV Guide Online rang up the hot chick before she took flight for home. TV Guide Online: So, how sorry is your husband now that he was so unsupportive of you during your extreme makeover?Rachel Love-Fraser: Oh, he really wasn't that unsupportive. It was just hard for him to have me gone for so long. I mean, four months... you can imagine! You get kind of edgy. We did have some difficulties a couple of times [during the program], but he was definitely supportive. It's just unfortunate that only that one side of his personality got shown. We're having a blast now, though! TVGO: I'

Fri, May 28, 2004

Spaces ''Villain'' Gets Ugly

It has been said (to us, even) that Trading Spaces' Doug Wilson hates being branded a bad guy. "I told him one time that he was the villain of the show, and he was [horrified], like, 'Oh my God! Do you really think so?!'" hunky handyman Ty Pennington once told TV Guide Online. Yet the demanding designer will risk tarnishing his reputation once again as the host of America's Ugliest..., a new series of quarterly Learning Channel specials with an insult built right into the title. "It's okay," the genial almost-40-year-old insists now. "I knew I was playing the villain. Throughout my life, I have worked not only in design but as an actor as well, so I knew what made good theater. I actually created some of those [tense] situations. I would see an opportunity and say, 'Okay, this could be some good TV!' After all, that's what this is about: entertainment. Design has always been secondary for me on Trading Spaces."

Wed, May 26, 2004

Swan Reject: The Next Paula Abdul?

Last week, the makeover artists of The Swan crushed contestant Kelly B.'s dream of competing in their plastic-surgery pageant. But instead of letting bitter tears stain her brand-new cheeks with mascara, the 25-year-old Milwaukee resident decided to pursue another heartfelt goal — to become a cheerleader. Here, straight up, she tells TV Guide Online all about it. TV Guide Online: Would you have been perfectly happy to leave The Swan with just a nose job?Kelly B.: Yeah. My nose is something that I was teased about ever since third or fourth grade. I always ripped up any pictures of me and my side profile. Even as I got older, people would say, "Did you get hit?" or "Did you break your nose?" It's just a big deal for me. TVGO: No pun intended, I'm sure. So is your boyfriend as big a jerk as he appeared to be on air? He was awfully unsupportive.Kelly B.: It was a little creative editing, I think. My boyfriend was supportive of

Wed, May 19, 2004

The Swan's Tooth Lady Speaks!

We'll be the first to admit that, while we can't seem to tear ourselves away from it, we don't feel good about watching The Swan (airing Mondays at 9 pm/ET on Fox). Week after week, plain Janes undergo hours and hours of plastic surgery, only to come out the other end looking like members of a Pamela Anderson cult. But now that we've gotten a look at the gnarly choppers on recent also-ran Dawn, we're going to shut our mouths. By allowing this 33-year-old mother of five to smile without embarrassing herself or frightening anyone, the show actually has performed a public service. If only by ringing up the Indiana resident for a post-op interrogation we could say we were doing the same. TV Guide Online: Since anger was one of your big issues, I feel obliged to ask — for the sake of my own well-being — um, are you in a good mood today?Dawn: [Reassuringly] Oh, it's not like that at all. I'm wonderful. Better than I've ever been!

Mon, May 17, 2004

Weepy Swan Laughs Last

As The Swan's surgically enhanced beauty pageant draws ever nearer (with back-to-back episodes tonight, starting at 8 pm/ET), TV Guide Online rings up last week's could've-been contender, Andrea, at home in Colorado to find out whether her foul mood has improved since the docs diminished her acne scars. TV Guide Online: If I'm not mistaken, you cried more than any other contestant. Was your surgery secretly underwritten by Kleenex?Andrea: They sure made it look that way! Maybe Kleenex could call me, and I could do their commercials. TVGO: Why not? Anyway, at the beginning of the show, you said your problem was insecurity. Why not consult a shrink instead of a plastic surgeon?Andrea: When I heard about the show, it said that it was a "life makeover." That's one reason I chose to do it. And it really did change my life, with all the therapy. I'm still continuing therapy here in Denver... TVGO: I'm sure that after questioning you

Mon, May 10, 2004

Swan Lays a Fashion Plate

As The Swan's plastic surgeons sharpen their scalpels to transform yet another average Jane into a future Stuff covergirl in tonight's episode (airing at 9 ET on Fox), TV Guide Online catches up with the lipo-lovin' reality series' last overhaul recipient, Kathy R.. We couldn't believe the 27-year-old part-time vacuum-cleaner salesperson really wouldn't pursue her dream career in fashion because she didn't think she looked the part. (Seriously, had she seen Betsey Johnson?) Alas, the Illinois native wasn't kidding. Read on, and see for yourself. TV Guide Online: Kathy, you do know that in order to be a designer, you don't have to be a model, right?Kathy R.: I know. But I always had this preconceived notion that only a certain type of person would be in that type of business. I never really felt like I fit in. I always kind of felt like I had to hold my personality back. TVGO: But you had a cute boyfriend who a

Mon, May 3, 2004

Joan "Mystery" Solved!

When you're master and commander of your own hit series, you can do anything you like: make a cameo appearance, name a character after yourself, give a job to your daughter, Tori... The sky's the limit! Joan of Arcadia creator Barbara Hall knows this very well. So, she tells TV Guide Online, she refused to play God with the songs she writes and records with partner Michael Guidry as the Enablers. "A lot of different people pick the music for the show, and what I do is make [our material] available to them, because, for me, it doesn't count unless they choose it," Hall explains. "Otherwise," she adds with a laugh, "it's just me putting my music on my own show, which is not hard to do!" Finally, after almost a full year, Hall's team of taste-makers has selected one of her tunes, the perkily ponderous "Mystery," for use in Friday's season finale (8 pm/ET on CBS). We can't accuse the staff of kissing up to the boss lady, eithe

Fri, Apr 30, 2004

Seven Silly Questions for&#133 Tonya Harding

Well, folks, we have now officially heard it all: On Sunday night's season premiere of Comedy Central's The Man Show (10 pm/ET), comedian Doug Stanhope is going to get his funny bone broken in the boxing ring by Tonya Harding, the slap-happy former ice princess who now beats people up legally. In honor of this bizarre and momentous occasion, we are risking life and limb to ask the muscle-bound pugilist seven silly questions. (Oh, the things we do for you people!) TV Guide Online: As guys go, Doug Stanhope is kind of a wuss. So don't you think the producers should have thrown co-host Joe Rogan into the ring, too... you know, just to keep the fight fair?Tonya Harding: Doug's very wussy — he fights like a b---h! I would rather have fought Rogan, because it would have been much more of a challenge. TVGO: Who screamed more like a girl when they got slugged — Doug or your Celebrity Boxing opponent, Paula Jones?Har

Thu, Apr 29, 2004

Swan Gooses Docs!

Before The Swan hacks away at another ugly duckling's beak (Monday at 9 pm/ET on Fox), let's give it up for Tawnya C.. Sure, the 40-year-old mother of two volunteered to be putty in the hands of a bunch of plastic surgeons she had never met. But, rather than let the docs go mad on her mug, she took a pass on a nose job and face-lift — in the process losing herself a spot in the reality hit's upcoming pageant for extreme-makeover recipients. Is she nuts... or merely crazy like the fox she now is (and, if you ask us, was to begin with)? TV Guide Online rang up the divorc&eacute;e at home in Denver for a little post-op chitchat. TV Guide Online: During the show, you remarked that you wanted to be a different person. Who did you want to be?Tawnya C.: I wanted to be the person that I was about 10 years ago [before my brother's death, the breakup of my marriage and my joining the ranks of the unemployed]... the person who was more happy-go-lucky, not

Fri, Apr 23, 2004

Reba ''Cashes'' In

Since Nashville legend Reba McEntire had already won just about every prize in existence, CMT's Flame-Worthy VMAs had to go and invent a new one for her: the Johnny Cash Visionary Award, which she'll receive during Wednesday night's live ceremony (beginning at 8 pm/ET). "It's an honor to be placed in any category with Johnny," the modest star of WB's Reba tells TV Guide Online. However, she won't be saluting the original man in black by donning his trademark funereal attire. "I normally wear black, but I have chosen something different for this show." We shouldn't be surprised. Change, it seems, is the one constant in McEntire's life at the moment. For starters, she's about to hit the road for the first time in three years. "I needed that break after touring for 25 years straight," she says. "Now I'm energized by the music again." So much so that, while the Britneys of the world have come to rely on smoke and mirrors to make their concerts mem

Wed, Apr 21, 2004

Swan to Maxim: Call Me!

Talk about your mixed blessings: Judges on The Swan elected not to send enlisted woman Kristy G. on to their ugly-duckling pageant because she was too pretty before they worked their magic on her! But the California girl remains determined to take her place in the spotlight — and preferably while wearing her undies! Here, she reveals to TV Guide Online her unique master plan. TV Guide Online: So, how does it feel to know that you were too cute pre-surgery to earn a place in The Swan pageant?Kristy G.: Oh, I didn't need them to validate the progress that I had made. The only disappointment, if any, was that I wasn't going to get to win any cash or prizes. (Laughs) Honestly, I already feel like the swan. So I don't need [the pageant]. What I have is enough already. TVGO: One of the first things you said in the recovery room was that you couldn't wait to put on a halter top, go-go boots and a canary-yellow miniski

Mon, Apr 19, 2004