SurfaceWow, not a good day to be an eerily attractive clone. You wake up in the morning, have a nice cup of coffee at your desk, and the next thing you know, you're hogtied with duct tape and crammed into the trunk of a Dodge Stratus. (And a big shout-out to Will Ferrell for making that the funniest car name in automotive history. "Don't talk about my Dodge Stratus!") It's enough to make a guy put a bullet in his own brain. No, wait, scratch that it's enough to make a guy sit real still for a momentary misdirect before letting a hysterical Dr. Laura go. Meanwhile, Crazy-Eyed Rich gets busted in the Great Big Cryo-Lab of Doom, and Miles nearly gets himself tarred and feathered by an angry mob of townsfolk. Oh, sure, you electrocute one

bully in the schoolyard and suddenly everybody's a critic. The catchphrase of the night? "The cat's out of the bag." Have these people been watching the show at all? Sea monsters. Boys turning into sea monsters. The occasional talking monkey girl. But no cats. Let's choose our idioms more carefully, shall we? Looks like next week Miles is finally gonna meet up with Rich and Laura... and I'm not even going to ask how the weepy marine biologist makes it from West Coast to East just in time for a "double tsunami" to make landfall. Just get on with it already, so I can watch Sasha and Michelle duke it out on the ice.