Charlie Sheen Charlie Sheen

Oh, Hollywood. It's like high school all over again. Case in point: Charlie Sheen is mouthing off to pop starRihanna after the singer refused a request to meet Sheen's fiancée while the two celebrities were out independently at Santa Monica's Giorgio Baldi restaurant last night, according to TMZ.

Sheen took to Twitter to describe the experience that left him heated. The Anger Management star said he took his "gal," former porn star Scottine, out to dinner for her birthday when he heard Rihanna was at the same restaurant. He "sent a request" over to Rihanna's table for a meet and greet, seeing how Scottine was a huge fan of hers. Sheen alleges Rihanna declined to meet them because "there were too many [paparazzi] outside, and it just wasn't possible at this time."

The most charisma-free actors

According to Sheen's manifesto tweet, the denial upset his girlfriend, though he said it was "no biggie for me; it would have been 84 interminable seconds of chugging Draino [sic] and 'please kill me now' that I'd never get back." Sheen continued, "Sorry we're not KOOL enough to warrant a blessing from the Princess. (or in this case the Village idiot)."

He went on to mock Rihanna's appearance, saying, "Halloween isn't for a while" and that she wore a "bad wig."

Rihanna fired back (on Twitter of course) with, "If that old queen don't get ha diapers out of a bunch..."

TV's biggest drunks

That drew more fire from Sheen, who sent a poem to TMZ that makes about as much sense as anything that Sheen has said.

"Firstly, I want to thank you for recognizing me as Royalty. I'm flattered. And secondly; do the good Queen a favor and go tend to the dungeon in my Castle. But beware of the rats and the snakes. They stir with folly awaiting your tepid advance, in the shadows..." He signed it, "Later Doosh! cs"

Whose side are you taking? Do you even care?

Catch up on Sheen's ironically titled Anger Management right here