OMG! You are so evil! How ...

Question: OMG! You are so evil! How could you post that Blind Item about a flatlining show on the verge of coming back from the dead and not tell us which show it actually is?! Spill!

Answer: OK, just make sure you're reading this on an empty stomach. Or at least near an open toilet. The name of the low-rated, little-loved show that's thisclose to being picked up for another season is According to Jim! Actually, forget the "thisclose" part; I'm told the decision has already been made. I think one rival network exec put it best when, upon learning of this stunning development yesterday, told me, "If this was caused by the strike, then we definitely lost too much." Adds TV Guide's Matt Roush: "Too funny. Too sad. And too true." Chimes in TV Guide's Bruce Fretts: "The terrorists won." Fires back TV Guide's Michael Ausiello: "Oh, I see. You guys have time to contribute snarky quotes to Ask Ausiello, but you can't make room in your skeds to attend my birthday party over the weekend? Not. Cool."

Roush: "If I'd known Janel Moloney was coming. "

Fretts: "What's this about Janel Moloney?"

Ausiello: "It's true. Janel Moloney came to my birthday party."

Fretts: "Thanks for letting me know! I would've come!"

Ausiello: "I'm tired of everyone using me to gain access to my famous friends!"

Fretts: "I "

To be continued.