michael.ausiello
Apprentice Babe Blinks
Donald Trump was running a two-for-one special on last Thursday's The Apprentice. Not only did he fire 28-year-old investment manager Wes Moss, but he also terminated 31-year-old marketing guru Maria Boren. Adding insult to injury, the pair didn't even get their own cabs! Luckily, TV Guide Online's Michael Ausiello doesn't believe in sharing, so he gave Maria her very own Q&A and devoted a portion of this week's "Ask Ausiello" to Wes. Simply put, everyone's a winner!TV Guide Online: OK, what the hell happened to you in Thursday's episode?Maria Boren: At the photo shoot, we were all feeling the pressure of making a deadline. And Wes had actually come up to me on a couple of different occasions and said, "We really need to see this happen." The point where I actually flew off the handle at him was when he came over one last time and said, with added passion, "We have got t
Question: I always thought ...
Question: I always thought Felicity should have ended with her college-graduation episode. It was the perfect, sweetest, most touching and satisfying finale. What do you think? — Nancy Ausiello: I agree. The college-graduation episode — featuring a cameo by my left arm — was the perfect bookend to the pilot. That said, those final Time Warp episodes were a terrific comedic showcase for Keri. She almost made me forget how utterly implausible the story was.
Question: I was wondering ...
Question: I was wondering when Hawaii comes back on in two weeks, what is going to happen to LAX? I really like both shows. — Carolyn Ausiello: Oh, Carolyn, did no one tell you? (Deep breath) Come sit down with me. (Grabbing Carolyn's hand) I don't know how to say this so, um... I'm just gonna say it: They're gone, Carolyn. (She sobs) Hawaii died last month and LAX passed away over the weekend. (She wails) The doctors said their suffering was only going to get worse, so it's really for the best. (She faints) Carolyn? Carolyn? Someone call 911! (To be continued... )
Question: You're cute! Which ...
Question: You're cute! Which team do you play on? Danny Pintauro's or Colin Farrell's? — Carlos M. Ausiello: A-ha, trick question! Danny Pintauro doesn't play sports. Nice try, Carlos.
Miss Piggy Travels to Oz
Someone alert the Lollipop Guild: Miss Piggy's coming to town — and she's brandishing a broomstick! This May, ABC will air The Muppets' Wonderful Wizard of Oz, a two-hour twist on the classic fable that casts Kermit as the Scarecrow, Gonzo as the Tin Man, Fozzie as the Cowardly Lion and Miss Piggy — in a tour de force that is already garnering Emmy buzz — as all four witches. During a break in filming, the ageless beauty chatted with TV Guide Online about her latest acting challenge and rumors that the Vancouver set wasn't big enough for her and pop star Ashanti, who stars as Dorothy.TV Guide Online: Did you have a favorite witch?Miss Piggy: It is so difficult to choose a favorite when moi is so exquisitely good as all four witches. But I must admit that after years of playing the adorable ingenue in my movies, it was a lot of fun to play that bad girl, The Wicked Witch of the West. Of course, it was difficult for someone as
Question: I just read last ...
Question: I just read last week's column and I didn't see a winner of the weekly "I can't believe you're asking me this. It's insulting, honestly. It's absolutely insulting" Award for the "Ask Ausiello" question with the most obvious answer! Why? — Jen Ausiello: It's a recurring thing, Jen. Sort of like Nicollette Sheridan on Desperate Housewives.
Question: While your response ...
Question: While your response to the question "What does 'Jump the Shark' mean?" was flippant and, obviously, incorrect, your answer was also right on the money. That episode of Six Feet Under had me yelling and throwing pillows at the TV. Now I hear it's going off after this season. Serves 'em right. — Mike in Dallas Ausiello: Yeah, the only saving grace about Six Feet's demise is that we'll never have to endure another episode like that again. I don't know what the hell Alan Ball was thinking.
Question: Can you tell us any ...
Question: Can you tell us any spoilers from life as we know it? — Leonardo M. Cocentino Ausiello: In early December, the show dies.
Question: Were you a fan of ...
Question: Were you a fan of any of the '80s-era nighttime soaps? I loved Knots Landing. It was smurferriffic. — Aaron Ausiello: I never really got into Knots Landing. I was much more of a Falcon Crest kinda guy — pre-Pilar. In its heyday (1983-Pilar), no prime-time sudser mixed comedy, drama, romance and intrigue more deftly than Crest. And no one — and I repeat, no one — did cliff-hangers better. Again, pre-Pilar. Everything went to pot when she showed up.
Apprentice Hothead Mouths Off
If loose lips sink ships, then 31-year-old Apprentice also-ran Chris Russo may want to strap on an extra life preserver. During the two months he spent kissing up to Trump, the politically incorrect (yet oddly likable) Long Islander came off a smidge chauvinistic (remember the bridal store "bitch"?), a tad homophobic (b---j-bs = gay support!) and a touch traitorous ("My team sucks, Don!"). Now, let's see if we can add apologetic to the list...TV Guide Online: Was Thursday's bridal task rigged to make you lose?Chris Russo: I don't think the competition was rigged to make me lose. I do believe there was a slight chance the wedding task was not the next task in line. But this is Mr. Trump's game, and if he wanted to change things up to have me tested after opening my mouth the week before, he makes the rules. TVGO: Do you think your accent was an obstacle when you were making those phone calls? Maybe the women at those bridal st
Question: When are Joey's ...
Question: When are Joey's former Friends going to make cameos on his show? I think we all know it needs it. Also, Smurfs are so overrated. — Chase Ausiello: Take it back. Take it back! Take it back or I won't tell you about David Schwimmer's upcoming cameo.
Question: On The West Wing, ...
Question: On The West Wing, did Sam lose his election in California, and if yes, what's he up to now? — Leanne Ausiello: I'm checking on this for you, Leanne.
Question: If you don't plug ...
Question: If you don't plug (shamelessly, I might add) TV Guide magazine or one of its products, do you lose your column, get a smaller cubicle or something like that? — Nicolle Ausiello: Even worse: My picture shrinks.
Question: What kind of column ...
Question: What kind of column is this? You mostly talk about yourself. And they're paying you for this? — Boris Ausiello: I can't believe it myself, Boris. Honestly.
Question: I miss my weekly ...
Question: I miss my weekly James Marsters fix so badly I'm going to be reduced to watching him on The Mountain this Sunday. The Mountain! — Mary Ausiello: Desperate times, Mary. Desperate times. And you better pray The Mountain is still on by Sunday. Last week's episode attracted fewer than 2 million viewers. I'm pretty sure more people watched Manhunt on Bravo. (That joke has now officially gotten old.)
Question: Is there still a ...
Question: Is there still a chance Noah Wyle will hang around ER for a 12th season so that Carter and Abby will have a reunion? Please, please tell me yes. — Mel Ausiello: Oh Mel, you'd be wise to keep an eye on my "TV News" column in TV Guide magazine later this month. Speaking of which, The Powers That Be wanna rename said column. They're looking for something a little catchier — preferably, with the word "Ausiello" in it. Send me your suggestions ASAP. If we pick your entry you'll get a special prize! (And no, I won't make you send me a check this time. I should have my credit-card machine up and running by then.)
Question: Do you have any ...
Question: Do you have any German fans besides me? — Andreas Ausiello: There's some guy in Stuttgart who keeps challenging me to a thumb-wrestling duel, but I'm starting to think it's just my older brother trying to be funny.
Question: This is not a ...
Question: This is not a question but a statement of fact. Tru Calling has been canceled. The guy who played Tru's brother broke the news last month at the Sci-Fi convention. The show will be missed. — Andre Ausiello: Thanks for the scoop, Andre. You wouldn't by any chance know if Sam lost his election on The West Wing, would you?
Question: Do you like me? ? ...
Question: Do you like me? — Michelle Ausiello: I want to, but you make it really difficult sometimes.
Question: All ? OK almost all ...
Question: All — OK almost all — of your fans say how cute you are, but how can they tell? Is there a blown-up photo someplace else that I've missed 'cause I can barely make anything out in that itty-bitty "thing" at the top of the column. Or maybe I need my eyes checked. — Space Nutt Ausiello: You're just going to have to take my word for it, Space.
Question: Did you watch the ...
Question: Did you watch the Dallas reunion? Did you think it was totally lame? It had way too many commercials and they conveniently forgot to mention most of the costars that helped make the show a success. — Jennifer Ausiello: Yeah, I was underwhelmed to say the least. I didn't like how they grouped everyone into pairs and then videotaped them casually reminiscing to each other. Not only did it make for snooze-inducing television, but I found myself cringing during every awkward silence. And I could have done without Steve Kanaly flirting with Charlene Tilton in the barn. That was just creepy. If they were smart, CBS would have gotten Mike Wallace to grill them individually and then collectively about all the dirt that went on behind the scenes (i.e., Larry Hagman's drinking, the Donna Reed recast, Tilton). And I'm with you on the MIA supporting cast. Where the heck was Priscilla Presley? And Susan Howard? And