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Why It's Not a Big Deal That Kaitlyn Had Sex on The Bachelorette

If a guy had sex on The Bachelor, would he be shamed for it? Probably not

Robyn Ross

The episode that The Bachelorettehas been teasing since the premiere is here and while the fallout has yet to be shown, we now know that Kaitlyn and Nick had sex in Dublin.

Spoiler alert! Women have sex. Sometimes they have sex after a few dates. Sometimes they have sex after a few hours of meeting someone. Yes, Kaitlyn is on a reality show and therefore she's opened herself up to be judged. Heck, part of the fun of watching reality TV is to judge and react. But while this is the first time (that we know of) that the Bachelorette has had sex before the Fantasy Suite dates, if it were a Bachelor who had sex, would he be shamed? No, but the woman who chose to sleep with him probably would have been.

The Bachelorette's Chris Harrison: As soon as Kaitlyn saw Nick, it was over

Kaitlyn has been very up-front about her sexuality this whole season, not to mention, the very first time we met her during Chris' season, she made a pun about him "plowing her field." (We won't give Ian the satisfaction of explaining how he used this all against her.) So if this openness and confidence in who she is contributed to her popularity with the audience, so much so that she was named the Bachelorette, shouldn't she be celebrated for staying true to who she claimed to be in the beginning: someone who lives in the moment and thinks with her heart sometimes before her head?

As Kaitlyn put it during the episode, "I don't necessarily feel guilty about the act. It's more just guilt from caring about other relationships I have. I've never done this before, I've never dated this many guys and had to feel this guilt." Yes, this completely changes the course of the season because whether you think it's right or wrong (and there is no right or wrong in this case), it will affect her budding relationships with the other men -- even if they're unaware of what happened.

But let's remember this is Kaitlyn's journey, not ours, to finding a husband and whatever happens along the way is for her to reconcile with, not us.

The Bachelorette airs on Mondays at 8/7c on ABC.
Watch Kaitlyn tease what's next below: