Unhappily Ever After

Episode 1

X-Happily Ever After

Sun, Sep 13, 1998

Poking fun at Ally McBeal's dancing baby. And likening Calista Flockhart to E.T. Riding the wave of the X-Files, Tiffany and Ryan become paranormal investigators. No, aliens didn't abduct Jennie. She ran off with her lesbian lover. Never to be seen again.

Episode 2

Feline Alright

Sun, Sep 20, 1998

How far would Tiffany go to get an easy A? Brains won't help, for new teacher Mr. Studebaker demands his household chores done in exchange for the one precious A he'd award this year. Hell, no, we won't go. Watch out, though, for rival Barbara is ready to jump as he dictates. So... But if sucking up to teacher means taking care of his constipated kitty, that's the last straw.

Episode 3

Basketball... Again?

Sun, Sep 27, 1998

Episode 4

A Movie Show

Sun, Oct 4, 1998

Tiffany has yet another boyfriend. A sensitive type, with finer tastes, who wants to tag along to go see, wait for it, The Bridges Of Madison County. No, he's not gay, just the answer to Tiffany's dreams. But a fat lot of good he turns out to be in the theater where louts are heckling the movie and tossing popcorn at the audience. Ryan, surprisingly, turns out to be a hero when he stands up to be a man - but, of course, gets knocked down. Up to our heroine to solve the matter her way.

Episode 5

Love Letters

Sun, Oct 11, 1998

What is the appeal of European men? Tiffany loses her heart to a French exchange student, and Ryan hits it big with the ladies when he assumes a German disguise, even though he gets mistaken as the Planters' Peanuts logo. But Tiffany's heartthrob soon turns out to be a ten, twenty-timing rat copying her love letter to him, stealing her words to send them out to every hot chick at Northridge. Including Barbara. Who falls in love with those words. And now sees Tiffany in a different light.

Episode 6

I Know What You Did in the Closet

Sun, Oct 25, 1998

Back in 1988, mischievous little Ryan played a trick on his little sister Tiffany, and trapped her inside the closet. And announced that she was now at the mercy of the Closet Monster. Thus scarring her for life, forever afraid of that looming dark closet. Now, ten years later, it's payback time. Tiffany will have her revenge.

Episode 7

Ross' IQ

Sun, Nov 1, 1998

Much to his chagrin, Ross' IQ is revealed to be just average. Having already said "So long, suckers!" to everybody else back at school, he takes this news very hard. It's up to Ryan and Jack to explain to him that being mediocre had its distinct advantages. Less trips to the psychiatrists. And Mr. Floppy becomes a televangelist. Now the duped faithful has a place to send their hard-earned dollars.

Episode 8

The Fencing Show

Sun, Nov 8, 1998

Tiffany's always had an exemplary scholastic record, but not so when it came to sport. But she finds an obscure sport at which she is sure to excel. In the absence of any other competitors, that is. The ancient art of fencing. Alas, turns out Barbara's secret pastime sets her up to be Tiffany's nemesis.

Episode 9

Smart and Stupid

Sun, Nov 15, 1998

Jack misses the love of his life, gone for three months already. No, not Jenny. Of course not. With the bill for cable TV unpaid, that's gone out of the door as well. So, now it's up to Tiffany and Ryan to appear on an inane TV quiz show with a thousand dollar cash prize to bring back cable. No, better still, satellite dish.

Episode 10

The Silver Rule

Sun, Nov 22, 1998

Star reporter Tiffany on the trail of a scoop. Theres an ex-Nazi living somewhere in Van Nuys. And his grandson might be attending Northridge. And on a selfless do-gooding kick, despite being warned against it, Tiffany tries to help out uber-nerd Elliott at the school paper. But ends up getting sued for sexual harassment.

Episode 11

Secrets

Sun, Dec 13, 1998

Ryan tells one about a night of love with Penny at Tiffany.

Episode 12

Royal Flush

Sun, Jan 10, 1999

Episode 13

Taffy's Boy

Sun, Jan 17, 1999

Ryan's big love. Well, literally. All in the name of money. Yes, Ryan becomes the one pursued. By a, well, big, er, rather large chick. Who happens to be loaded. Lots and lots loaded. And so, instead of a career selling rotting oranges to passing motorists, Ryan lines himself up for easy street. Gigolo time. Big time.

Episode 14

Tiffany's Big Break

Sun, Jan 24, 1999

If she'd be the spokesperson for a bank, Tiffany has the chance to do a lucrative TV commercial. But it's the same bank that turned down Jack's loan when she was a kid, and she then had to lose out on any Christmas present. No forgetting, no forgiving, Malloy rule. Of course, blonde hussy Barbara is waiting in the wings, eager to grab the opportunity for herself. And Ryan found an abandoned dog he believes to be Toby The Wonder Dog from the movie Old Feller, and is trying to find it a home. Bared fangs face Ross. And Jack, who had really meant that loan for investing in twenty-five percent of a little company called Microsoft, plans his just revenge. Every dog gets his day.

Episode 15

I Never Dunked for My Father

Sun, Feb 7, 1999

Basketball yet again. Jack is supposed to play a Father/Son basketball game with Ross. The lure of the trophy is his only incentive, but Ross? That little loser? So, he has other ideas. Even Ryan is preferable. Tiffany has to keep Ross in the dark. And Floppy has a gripe against dentists. Solution: Kill them all.

Episode 16

Sex & Violins

Sun, Feb 14, 1999

Barbara is padding her Harvard resume with outright lies. Like, she'd been a secretary of the Pope. Utter drivel. Jack's parenting skills include urging his daughter to appreciate the value of being untruthful, so she follows suit. Pretends to be able to play the violin like a professional concert performer. Harvard would lap that up. But she can't play. Will just wing it. False notes ensue. But in front of the right audience, in a red dress paired with high heels... Vanessa Mae, eat your heart out.

Episode 17

Tiffany Burger

Sun, Feb 21, 1999

Never give up. A young tycoon, the owner of several fast food restaurants, falls in love with Tiffany, and to woo her over, hires unemployable Ryan, and promises easy-to-please Jack an enormously huge TV. But Tiffany spurns his advances. Obsessed, he names his latest dish after her. Tiffany Burger. Yum.

Episode 18

The Perfect Guy

Sun, Feb 28, 1999

Aw, no. Tiffany has yet again found Mr. Right. The problem this time is that he's just absolutely too disconcertingly perfect. He's smarter than Tiffany, beats her at chess, is just all round super at everything he does. So she decides to dump him. But then realizes she can't give up anybody this great. Meanwhile, Mr. Floppy starts thinking about the future. After all, this is the final season of the show. What's he gonna do? Ah, hot club dancer. Too bad nothing like that for Jack.

Episode 19

Date to Win

Sun, May 2, 1999

Episode 20

The Artist and the Con Artist

Fri, Mar 5, 1999

Episode 21

Tiffany Tutors the Teachers

Sun, May 16, 1999

Episode 22

Le Morte D'Floppy

Sun, May 23, 1999

College acceptance showdown as Tiffany and Barbara open up their responses from Harvard. And, as Jack finally makes it big in the business world, Mr. Floppy faces his existential crisis: If there is no place for him in Jack's imagination anymore, he is dead. Ominously, this is the last episode. Farewell, old friend.