Two and a Half Men
The Harper brothers Charlie and Alan are almost opposites but form a great team. They have little in common except their dislike for their mundane, maternally cold and domineering mother, Evelyn. Alan, a compulsively neat chiropractor and control-freak, is thrown out by his manipulative wife Judith who nevertheless gets him to pay for everything and do most jobs in the house. Charlie is a freelance jingle composer and irresistible Cassanova who lives in a luxurious beach-house and rarely gets up before noon. Charlie "temporarily" allows Alan and his son Jake, a food-obsessed, lazy kid who shuttles between his parents, to move in with them after Alan's separation/divorce. The sitcom revolves around their conflicting lifestyles, raising Jake (who has the efficient, caring dad while having a ball with his fun-loving sugar uncle who teaches him boyish things), and bantering with Evelyn and various other friends and family. Other fairly regular characters include Charlie's cleaning lady Berta and his rich, self-confessed stalker neighbor Rose who often sneaks in to spy on Charlie.
- Metascore67
- 2003-2015
- 12 seasons
- CBS
- Comedy, Drama
- TV-14
The Harper brothers Charlie and Alan are almost opposites but form a great team. They have little in common except their dislike for their mundane, maternally cold and domineering mother, Evelyn. Alan, a compulsively neat chiropractor and control-freak, is thrown out by his manipulative wife Judith who nevertheless gets him to pay for everything and do most jobs in the house. Charlie is a freelance jingle composer and irresistible Cassanova who lives in a luxurious beach-house and rarely gets up before noon. Charlie "temporarily" allows Alan and his son Jake, a food-obsessed, lazy kid who shuttles between his parents, to move in with them after Alan's separation/divorce. The sitcom revolves around their conflicting lifestyles, raising Jake (who has the efficient, caring dad while having a ball with his fun-loving sugar uncle who teaches him boyish things), and bantering with Evelyn and various other friends and family. Other fairly regular characters include Charlie's cleaning lady Berta and his rich, self-confessed stalker neighbor Rose who often sneaks in to spy on Charlie.
Season 12 Episode Guide
15 Episodes 2014 - 2015
Episode 1
The Ol' Mexican Spinach
Thu, Oct 30, 2014 22 mins
While he and Alan prepare for Halloween, Walden, costumed as zombie Elvis, has a minor cardiac crisis. During home revalidation, he takes stock of his life and decides his fortune is worthless without an heir. Given his disastrous dating history, Walden hopes to adopt, but is told only couples are seriously considered. Alan, who hoped to be adopted as heir, gets a surprising alternative offer.
Episode 2
A Chic Bar in Ibiza
Thu, Nov 6, 2014 21 mins
Alan's initial delight over billionaire Walden's marriage proposal subsides when Walden waves all trimming and it comes with a prenuptial. Their respective mothers push them to stand their ground, but a breakup makes both mates realize they don't want to be separated, so the 'non-sexual gay' couple's wedding is on.
Episode 3
Glamping in a Yurt
Thu, Nov 13, 2014 21 mins
Now Walden is legally married to Alan, the 'gay' couple must prove themselves a stable pair to make his adoption application stick. So they practice what to say and even demonstrative physical intimacy, actually getting to Alan's taste. It all goes great during the adoption officer's home visit, except that Lyndsey turns up, drunk as a skunk and more eager to jump Alan's bones then to help their case, so she must be kept hidden.
Episode 4
Thirty-Eight, Sixty-Two, Thirty-Eight
Thu, Nov 20, 2014 21 mins
After Walden child-proofs his beach-house, the final adoption agency officer visit, to ascertain the 'gay couple' has a stable home, is a triumph. She even announces unofficially that a birth mother has already selected them as prospective adoptive parents. It's a high-pregnant unmarried law student, who considers the pair of them perfectly complementary and promises them her unborn son so she can resume her planned lawyer career. Only when Herb, Larry and Barry accompany Walden and Alan to pick up 'their' son, she reconsiders while holding the bundle of joy in her arms.
Episode 5
Oontz. Oontz. Oontz.
Thu, Nov 27, 2014 22 mins
To Walden's delighted surprise, the adoption agency already has a boy for the "gay couple" to foster indefinitely with a view to adoption: not a baby, but already-somewhat-cynical pre-teen Louis. Alan has mixed feelings about reliving his experiences with Jake and being called "the mom", but plays along, encouraging and comforting Walden, who tries too hard and hopes for too much too soon. The trio does start to bond; even Berta makes an actual effort for once, and Louis starts to hope for a real home.
Episode 6
Alan Shot a Little Girl
Thu, Dec 4, 2014 21 mins
Walden and Alan finally get foster parenthood of Louis, but as Walden feared and social worker McMartin warned, the rascal is used to manipulate caregivers skillfully. Alan proves an easy prey for child pleas and tears, an most to the treat of being the cool parent, rather then having to control Jake. That forces generous Walden into the uncharacteristically unpopular part of the strict voice of reason, and strains the men's bond.
Episode 7
Sex with an Animated Ed Asner
Thu, Dec 11, 2014 21 mins
Walden gets utterly exhausted by Louis's inexhaustible boy energy, so Alan suggests finding some playmates who can exhaust the rascal for them. Walden takes them to a playground, but Louis keeps insisting that Walden must play with him. Alan is luckier, as kids' mothers are eager to bond with a gay "father" and his "gay partner", potential best friends. Soon both co-parents have found girlfriends and must come clean about being straight.
Episode 8
Family, Bublé, Deep-Fried Turkey
Thu, Dec 18, 2014 20 mins
Alan and Walden are having Christmas with Louis. They learn that he doesn't believe in Santa Claus. So Walden tries to prove him wrong. He gets a guy to play Santa and he will bring Louis' gift, a bike, which Rose told them he wants. Problem is the Santa he got, shows up drunk and Alan wanting to save money doesn't have the bike delivered assembled.
Episode 9
Bouncy, Bouncy, Bouncy, Lyndsey
Thu, Jan 8, 2015 21 mins
Walden and Louis's play-date Louise's mother are ready for sex, but he can't do it with Louis at home, and even in a hotel-room parental sensitivities prove excessive. Finding Alan in poor general shape, Herb drags him to the gym, where they meet Lyndsey, who won't be told by one ex to avoid the other, hence lands back in Herb's bed.
Episode 10
Here I Come, Pants!
Thu, Jan 15, 2015 21 mins
Everything seems perfect for Walden, with hot lover Laurel and a doting foster son up for adoption in half a year. Then adoption officer McMartin, paying a routine visit, treated to Walden boxers-only, discovers the foster-paternal couple is everything but gay, and declares it her duty to take Louis away. Alan's attempt to talk her over in bed backfires. Yet Walden refuses to give up and hammers on the absurdity of not having gay sex disqualifying him and husband-buddy Alan as devoted father.
Episode 11
For Whom the Booty Calls
Thu, Jan 22, 2015 21 mins
Alan is now happy as a clam as adoption officer McMartin's lover, but that only adds to Walden's stress for Louis's long-term benefit. Rather then answering his many questions about adoptive parenting, she refers him to a fathers support group. That male bonding without strings or clingy Alan is just what Walden needed, but when Walden hosts the group, his 'spunge spouse' wriggles in against explicit promises.
Episode 12
A Beer-Battered Rip-Off
Thu, Jan 29, 2015 22 mins
Walden's worried how his "relationship" with Miss McMartin will affect his plans to adopt Louis. Alan's hoping Lyndsey will stay in L.A. now they are back together. But she already sold her house so Alan tries help her find a place to stay. But when she suggest they move in together Alan doesn't respond well. So Lyndsey decides to go to San Francisco. Later Alan and Walden talk and Walden says Alan doesn't want to move in with Lyndsey because he doesn't want to leave the house. And Alan tells Walden Miss McMartin is perfect for him. So they both try to get them back.
Episode 13
Boompa Loved His Hookers
Thu, Feb 5, 2015 20 mins
In bed with adoption officer McMartin, Walden realizes she's a loon and ponders breaking up. Hearing that Alan turned down moving int a new home with Lyndsey to stay in the beach-house, Walden concludes they're wasting their best opportunities and risks telling the truth, as previous disastrous revelations didn't actually mes up the adoption. That works out for both of the men, or at least initially.
Episode 14
Don't Give a Monkey a Gun
Thu, Feb 12, 2015 20 mins
Walden and Alan had decided some time ago that after Louis' adoption was over they would get a divorce for them to be able to marry other people eventually. Walden wants to get Alan a "thank you" gift for all he has done with helping Walden adopt Louis. So Alan decides to get himself a gift that will kind of ruin his relantionship with Lyndsey. However, Alan finds a way to win Lyndsey back in a very important and big decision that may change his and Walden's life...
Episode 15
Of Course He's Dead: Part 1 & 2
Thu, Feb 19, 2015 38 mins
Alan gets a letter saying that Charlie has over two million in royalties. And he of course tries to get it but he needs Charlie's death certificate. So he goes to his mother to get it but she doesn't have it. And when Alan and his mother get packages and messages of a threatening nature, they wonder, is he really dead.
