Barney Miller
Barney Miller is the kind of cop we'd all like to run into. He is always sensible. He maintains order over a squad room of detectives who gamble for a hobby, get hit on by anything in skirts, go to renaissance philosophy conventions for fun, and would really prefer to be writing. Nearly all of the action takes place in the squad room where the citizens and criminals are brought in to complicate the mix.
- 1975-1982
- 8 seasons
- ABC
- Comedy, Drama
- TV-PG
Barney Miller is the kind of cop we'd all like to run into. He is always sensible. He maintains order over a squad room of detectives who gamble for a hobby, get hit on by anything in skirts, go to renaissance philosophy conventions for fun, and would really prefer to be writing. Nearly all of the action takes place in the squad room where the citizens and criminals are brought in to complicate the mix.
Season 8 Episode Guide
22 Episodes 1981 - 1982
Episode 1
Paternity
Thu, Oct 29, 1981 30 mins
Wojo is proved innocent in a paternity suit, but at a price. An angry patron vandalizes a theater. A beauty queen is robbed.
Episode 2
Advancement
Thu, Nov 5, 1981 30 mins
Harris signs a contract for a new book. A lottery winner seeks revenge when the ticket seller loses his winning ticket. Luger manipulates Barney into writing a letter to his mail-order bride.
Episode 3
The Car
Thu, Nov 12, 1981 30 mins
A car thief's conscience haunts him twenty-five years after the fact. An overzealous sanitation officer goes haywire. Levitt saves a child from certain danger.
Episode 4
Possession
Thu, Nov 19, 1981 30 mins
A disorderly conduct report leads to a man who insists he's possessed by an evil spirit. A husband is arrested for forcing his wife into designer jeans.
Episode 5
Stress Analyzer
Thu, Nov 26, 1981 30 mins
A Peace Corps recruiter goes overboard at a job fair. Dietrich volunteers for a department stress experiment.
Episode 6
Games
Thu, Dec 10, 1981 30 mins
A computer game processor manufacturer is accused of espionage. A U. S. Army Specialist supplements her income as a prostitute.
Episode 7
Homeless
Thu, Dec 17, 1981 30 mins
The precinct is overrun with vagrants on Christmas. A merchant uses a cattle prod as his weapon of choice. A greeting card writer snaps.
Episode 8
The Tontine
Thu, Jan 7, 1982 30 mins
The survivor of a tontine attempts suicide so he can leave the money to his cousin.
Episode 9
Examination Day
Thu, Jan 14, 1982 30 mins
The detectives work in uniform while Levitt and the others take their sergeant's exams. While working with the squad, Luger is overly rough with a perpetrator, and later with Barney.
Episode 10
The Clown
Thu, Jan 21, 1982 30 mins
Street clowns are being attacked by a serial mugger. A hundred inmates are secretly evacuated from holding in the middle of the night.
Episode 11
Chinatown: Part 1
Thu, Feb 4, 1982 30 mins
Harris and Dietrich are forced to share a hotel room in seclusion with an unco-operative murder witness until he talks. Lieutenant Scanlon falls for a wealthy mugging victim.
Episode 12
Chinatown: Part 2
Thu, Feb 11, 1982 30 mins
Harris and Dietrich drive each other ever crazier as they continue to be confined to their hotel room with their unco-operative witness. Lieutenant Scanlon's wealthy target of affection files harassment charges against him.
Episode 13
Hunger Strike
Thu, Feb 18, 1982 30 mins
Barney Miller is a candidate for promotion to Deputy Inspector, but he intends to remove himself from the candidate list. He doubts that he will qualify, as he was previously nominated for the same position in three different years and he failed to get the position. He has not received any promotion since 1975. His subordinates have to convince him to at least try to get through the evaluation tests, as their own chances for promotion depend on Miller moving up the ranks. A hunger striker named Philip Bishop is arrested for attacking food vendors, under the misconception that they were taunting him. Bishop has a number of political demands for his hunger strike, but he also demands the return of his cleaning deposit for an apartment which he had kept spotlessly clean for years. Wojo helps him get his deposit back, while ignoring his other requests. An old woman called by the alias of "Miss Smith" escapes from a mental asylum and is arrested for stealing a few roses from a flower shop. A psychiatrist called Dr. Packer arrives at the police department to reclaim his patient, claiming that she is a schizophrenic who can only speak gibberish. Dietrich suspects that there is something wrong with Packer's story, and then seeks to verify whether her words are actually meaningless. It turns out that "Miss Smith" is a migrant from Yugoslavia and that she has been trying to communicate with her doctors by speaking in her native language, Macedonian. She is otherwise perfectly sane.
Episode 14
The Arrival
Thu, Feb 25, 1982 30 mins
A disgruntled member burglarizes MENSA headquarters.
Episode 15
Obituary
Thu, Mar 11, 1982 30 mins
A newspaper obituary creates a commotion when the subject is discovered to be alive. The detectives arrest a modern-day chicken thief.
Episode 16
Inquiry
Fri, Mar 26, 1982 30 mins
Internal Affairs is called in when an arrest target levels a charge of excessive force against Wojo. An angry parent takes action when an exclusive kindergarten denies admission to his child.
Episode 17
Old Love
Fri, Apr 2, 1982 30 mins
Dietrich's old flame pays him a visit. A former child actor hits his agent with a telephone.
Episode 18
Altercation
Fri, Apr 9, 1982 30 mins
The Harris-Ripner conflict reaches a boiling point. A mugging victim confesses to a twenty-five- year-old crush on Barney.
Episode 19
Bones
Fri, Apr 30, 1982 30 mins
A museum presses charges when an Indian lifts his tribe's ancestral bones from an exhibit. A scoutmaster catches a mugger.
Episode 20
Landmark: Part 1
Thu, May 6, 1982 30 mins
Wojo's discovery of an ancient weapon results in a buyer expressing interest in the precinct building.
Episode 21
Landmark: Part 2
Thu, May 13, 1982 30 mins
The interested buyer purchases the precinct building. Dietrich arrests the head of a crime school. Luger tries to bail out on his mail-order bride.
Episode 22
Landmark: Part 3
Thu, May 20, 1982 30 mins
Everyone drops by to pay their last respects as the detectives prepare for new assignments. Harris contemplates resignation when he's assigned to Flushing Meadows. Barney recalls departed friends before he turns out the lights for the final time.
