First off, I'd like to apologize...
First off, I'd like to apologize to Jamey Sheridan for my tacky eye-patch comments from last week. The reason he wore it (which I wanted to know anyway) was the medical condition known as Bell's palsy, as a lot of people wrote into tell me. Pointless aside that I can't fit anywhere else: Ever notice that D.A. Carver is holding a knife in the opening credits? Now, on with the analyzin': This heavily hyped two-hour "event" began with a missing popular high-school girl, nipple clips and a guy who bites girls on the lip. Dug the ersatz Nancy Grace. "Smell the rotting meat in the air, that's the vultures gathering..." mused Deakins. Bethany (the name alone suggests a naïve tart — why didn't they call her Catherine or Joanne?) wasn't the only missing girl — there was a black girl who also disappeared. Nancy Grace apparently had no
