Question: I hear there is no new AA next week!Answer: Wow, word travels fast around here. Unfortunately, it's true. AA is going on a one-week hiatus due to Santa Claus' impending arrival. If that makes you angry, try channeling that negative energy into something positive. Like buying me a present.
Question: Please tell me it's not Emily Proctor who gets shot on CSI: Miami! Answer: It's not Emily Proctor. Combine that with last week's clue, and you're well on your way to having this surprise ruined for you!
Question: How much longer until MyNetwork TV goes under?Answer: That's funny. You invented a make-believe network, just like me!
Question: You're coming to Harrisburg this weekend? Come eat with me! Or do coffee! I'll bring you Snapple. I live in Hershey, which is 10 frakkin' minutes from Harrisburg!Answer: Actually, I just Google-mapped it, and Hershey is more like 23 minutes away, so you'll have to spring for a car service. And lunch.
Question: I invented a new game! It involves Smurfs, lighter fluid, matches and a catapult. Now, if you don't want me to try this game, you better give me some Office scoop at once! Like, who was Michael on the phone with? Answer: Jan! He was on the phone with Jan! I think!
Care to guess who's been cast as Sally Field's mom on Brothers & Sisters? Here's a hint: Sunday, Monday, Happy Days, Tuesday, Wednesday, Happy Days, Thursday, Friday, Happy Days, Saturday, what a day, Rockin' all week with you.If you guessed Marion Cunningham Ross, you're right! Although unconfirmed by ABC, sources tell me that Ross has landed the one-episode gig and will show up in February. Her character is described as "tough, obstinate, judgmental, direct and uncompromising." Happy days, indeed!
This just in: Dancing with the Stars grad Stacy Keibler is trying her hand at acting, signing on to What About Brian for a multi-episode arc. Per a source close to the show, the WWE diva — who'll first appear around February — will cause problems between Brian and current girlfriend Bridget when she moves in next door. In other Brian news, relative newcomer Jessica Szohr is joining the cast as a series regular. She'll play Keibler's roommate.This is probably a good time for me to ask: Is anyone watching this show?
Question: OK, I just watched the Nip/Tuck finale, and I still can't figure out what the number "2732" has to do with the big twist.Answer: It's the distance in miles between Miami and the show's new setting, Los Angeles. (FYI: There's a big story in today's Los Angeles Times about why series creator Ryan Murphy decided to relocate McNamara/Troy to Hollywood.)
Question: Since Intern Scott is gone, can I be your new intern? I'll be so good at it. Also, I work at a grocery store, so I get discounts on Snapple.Answer: Tell me more about this supposed Snapple discount.
Question: Bones spoilers, please.Answer: Have you heard that Eddie McClintock is beginning a multi-episode arc as a love interest for Brennan on Jan. 24? Then it's news to you!
Question: Anything you can share about the new season of The L Word?Answer: As you already know, Karina Lombard’s long-missed Marina makes a shocking return in the fourth season premiere on Jan. 7, which should cause big problems for the already bonkers Jenny, who has moved on from Moira-turned-Max to that French chick she hooked up with last year. Meanwhile, Kit makes a decision about her unborn baby that takes a bizarre twist once she goes to see her doctor.
Question: So when is this so-called Katee Sackhoff "Emmy episode" of Battlestar Galactica going to air?Answer: It's Episode 316, "Maelstrom," and it's tentatively scheduled to air Feb. 25.
Question: Can you tell us something more about this bun-in-the-oven twist you mentioned regarding Lana's baby on Smallville?Answer: No. Just wait. It’s hot. Happy holidays!
Question: You mentioned last week that in the upcoming Smallville episode "Crimson," the third Lois Lane will find herself flying over the Metropolis skyline. Care to expound?Answer: It won't be a solo flight.
Question: Per your hint last week, is the huge question about Heroes' Claire, "How did she find out about her abilities?" or, "Was she trying to commit suicide?"Answer: No on both counts.
Question: Is the big Claire question on Heroes, "Who are her real parents?"Answer: No comment. That's all for this week, folks! Head on over to the Ask Ausiello Discussion Thread in the Ausiello Report to chat about my cryptic answer to that last question. See you back here next week! * Offer not valid in the continental United States.
Question: Will we see a kiss the next time Michael and Sara meet up on Prison Break?Answer: Let's just say there's a moment in an upcoming episode when they finally act on their mutual attraction. Let's also just say it's about frakkin' time!
Question: Whatever happened to Michael Beach's character, Noah, on Brothers & Sisters? After hinting at a secret affair with Sarah, he hasn't been seen or mentioned again.Answer: As I understand it, the writers mutually decided that there were more interesting issues to explore between Sarah and Joe. I'm guessing — and this is purely a guess — that the interloper plot was a Marti Noxon creation.
Question: Please give us some information about Men in Trees!Answer: As I spilled exclusively in the Ausiello Report, Orlando Jones has been cast as Buzz's gay son. He's on board for two episodes, possibly more.
Question: I have to ask: If you could have a power like one of the Heroes, what would yours be?Answer: I'd want to read minds like Greg Grunberg does, that way I'd know if Masi Oka was pulling my leg when he told me last week that we "will see Hiro fighting a T-Rex" — hence the painting in the fall finale. "Don't forget," he added, "I [have a part-time job at] Industrial Light and Magic. You never know when I'll whip out a CGI dinosaur." Come tomorrow, Masi may be whipping out a Golden Globe nomination. (Talk about an awesome segue.) Does the possibility of a nod give him goose bumps? "To be honest, it does a little bit. You never know what's going to happen. We're just so happy the show is on the air. If we can get some accolades, I think that would be a great boost for NBC and the show."
Question: Can I get some scoop about Jericho?Answer: This piece of scoop is da bomb: Rumor has it that a February-sweeps episode will go back in time to chronicle the days leading up to Armageddon. I hear lots of character questions will be answered in the process.
Question: I heard that someone on Grey's will get pregnant. Would you happen to know who?Answer: Not sure about that, but I can tell you who's getting engaged: George and Callie! Although no one within six degrees of Shonda Rhimes would confirm it (shocker!), one well-placed mole tells me that they'll make the announcement during February sweeps. Now, why do you suppose George and Callie — who were still broken up in the last episode — would rush into marriage so quickly? Hmmm….
