You just know this isn't going to end well. During a routine encounter with the paps in Vegas on Tuesday, Wynn hotel security turned away the shutterbugs, at which point the retired singer's own bodyguard jumped one of the photographers. He now faces up to six months in prison. For her part, Brit hurled a baby bottle at the cameraman and yelled, "I am going to kill you!" No, this isn't going to end well at all.

And in unfortunately related news, sources tell Us magazine that - shocking - Spears' maternal instincts may be off. Supposedly, 22-month-old Sean is already having dental problems because whenever he cries, Mom gives him a bottle of juice. And Jayden's chompers aren't safe, either: La Spears reportedly asked an L.A. dentist if he would whiten both her kids' teeth. (He said no.)

Furthermore, a Britney insider alleges that the boys' diet consists largely of soda, Doritos and bubblegum - a choking hazard for wee ones. Bedtime, the source adds, may involve ice cream, as Mom thinks cold foods will make Sean sleepy.

This isn't going to end well, either.

Wednesday's Today's News was written by Ben Katner.