Danielle Staub Danielle Staub

Note: Violence is never the answer. However, what went down last night on The Real Housewives of New Jersey wasn't so much violence as it was the highest level of low-class art we've ever been blessed with. The screaming. The shoving. The insults. The fake hair. It was all so...Real Housewives. On 'roids.

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Picking up with last week's country-club run-in between Table-Flipper Teresa and "Prostitution Whore" Danielle, the situation went from a prickly "hello" to "is 'bitch' better?" to a running-with-the-bullies rampage in 10 screaming seconds. And then, BOOM! went the dynamite Ashley, who just reached into the melee and yanked on the Danielle's weave—a clump of which we got to see during her confessional. It was bananas, but still not as cray-cray as Danielle's escalating paranoia about the cast's plot to kill her, the fact that her "energist" a) exists and b) is so desperate for publicity that she'd make an on-camera peace-keeping call to Jacqueline, or the nasty side of Teresa that emerged after she instigated the whole mess in the first place. We love the goofy Guidice. The mean-girl Guidice? Not so much. As for Ashley, well, like we said, violence is no good. The consequences coming her way, however, are gonna be great!

Did you watch the unbe-weave-able attack? What side are you on?

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