Which Cap Got You Pregnant: America or Tylenol?

Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt has given viewers many amazing and hilarious gifts over the years, and Season 4 is no exception. In addition to the many wonderful sight gags, the season's sixth episode -- the final outing in this half-season, unfortunately -- features a storyline in which Xan (Dylan Gelula) worries she's pregnant after sleeping with a guy named Capsule "Cap" Tylenol. Yes, really. He is the heir to the Tylenol fortune, obviously.

In the end, it turned out Xan wasn't really pregnant -- she'd taken a Jane the Virgin prank pregnancy test -- but the entire storyline got us here at TV Guide (and even our esteemed former colleague Joyce Eng) thinking about which Cap it would be better to be impregnated by: America or Tylenol.

Let's take a look at the contenders.

In one corner, you have this guy, Captain America (Chris Evans). He was injected with a serum during World War II that turned him into a buff super soldier.

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In the other corner, you have this guy. His body closely resembles the scrawny kid Steve Rogers was before he became Captain America.

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This is what Cap the soldier looks like sweaty and shirtless.

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This is what the other guy looks like.

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Cap can rip logs in half even though there is an ax right there and he was literally just using it.

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Do you think Cap Tylenol can do that?

Captain America is 100 years old but can stop a freaking helicopter from taking off.

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Cap Tylenol is named after these things.

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Here is Cap with a magnificent beard. It caused a global meltdown.

Can the other Cap even grow a beard?

Again, here is Cap, the leader of the Avengers.

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And here is Cap, the guy named after a pill to reduce headaches and cramps.

Honestly...

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Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt's fourth season is now streaming on Netflix. Captain America is starring in your dreams.