Question: If Keri Russell guest-starred on Alias, would you consider liking it then? — Ellen Wong

Ausiello: Well, I'd certainly watch, Ellen. Speaking of Keri, she just joined the ensemble cast of Neil LaBute's new off-Broadway play Fat Pig. It's a comedy about a guy (Entourage's Jeremy Piven) who falls for a "generously proportioned" girl (Rescue Me's Ashlie Atkinson). Keri plays one of Piven's disapproving friends. The limited engagement begins Nov. 23 at the Lucille Lortel Theatre. For tickets, you can call Ticket Central (212-279-4200). Tell them you read about it in "Ask Ausiello" and you'll get a few seconds of uncomfortable silence.