Question: You are no longer consigned to a cubicle? Wow, congratulations! Couldn't have happened to a nicer, more intelligent (and do you work out? You look great!) person. Now, can I please have some scoop on Alias? Or Lost. Or Smallville? Please?

Answer: You had me at "Do you work out?" Here's some Smallville dirt: Episode 16 is sure to be slapped with a Beef Wellington warning when a mysterious woman shows up wearing a hypnotic crystal and turns Clark into her sex slave. Naturally, Lana walks in on them just as they're about to bump humps. She'll eventually forgive him he was in a trance, after all but it's still the end of the road for Supercouple. After seeing how much pain hiding his true identity always seems to cause her, Clark decides that the time has come to break things off. Guess whose shoulder she cries on? If you picked Lex, you're right!