Lisa Marie Presley Announces Pregnancy to Media Coyote Pack

Lisa Marie Presley announced Friday that she's pregnant with her third child, but not without lambasting the media for "slanderous and degrading stories" questioning the source of her weight gain in recent days. Unleashing her fury on her MySpace blog, Presley, 40, insists her announcement is under duress. "Once [the media] got a glimpse of my expanding physique a few days ago," she wrote, "they have been like a pack of coyotes circling their prey whilst eerily howling with delight." Presley continued, "They couldn't wait to find out if my weight gain was because I was just overeating, in which case it would be open season and they can do the old following in her fathers [sic] sad and unfortunate demise story again or... much to their dismay, I could just be pregnant... at which point they should probably wipe the saliva off of their fangs and put them back in their mouths or they may expose the black little souls that they are. "Now that things are confirmed," she added, "hopefully they can stop all of the harassment and I can stop dodging the continuous bullets." Phew! Once she let that out, she caught her breath and sought some empathy, saying, "Pardon my seething contemptuous tone but ladies, you know if you were pregnant and you felt you were expanding uncontrollably... and the worldwide media started badgering and harassing you for it... you would be mortified as well." Presley also notes that she and husband Michael Lockwood are "incredibly overjoyed" about the now-confirmed pregnancy. The singer is already mom to two teens with ex-husband Danny Keough. But where was Adrian Grenier during all of this? - Anna Dimond