I've Read the First Gilmore Girls Script!

Don't ask me how I got it. Or from whom. But I got it.
By "it," I'm referring to the most sought-after 77 pages in Hollywood right now - the script for the season premiere of Gilmore Girls, penned by David S. Rosenthal. OK, so maybe "the most sought-after" is a slight exaggeration, but it's definitely been the most sought after by me. You see, this script contains answers to some of the new season's biggest questions. Among them: Can Rosenthal mimic Team Palladino's signature, rapid-fire rhythms? How will last May's controversial finale affect Luke and Lorelai? Does the boss favor some supporting characters over others? And, most importantly, is the thing any good?
Let's start with that last question first. I'm happy and greatly relieved - and, if I'm being completely honest, a smidge shocked - to report that yes, it's good. In fact, it's better than good - it's great.
Obviously, I can't get too specific. As it is, Warner Bros. and CW have probably already hired a bounty hunter to track down the source of the script leak. But here are some things I learned about Mr. Rosenthal after reading his debut as show-runner, with a few spoilers mixed in for fun.
He has Palladino blood in him.
Translation: He's got Amy and Dan's style down pat. When I finished the script, I almost had to look back at the byline to make sure the last name was Rosenthal and not Palladino. Honestly, I could not tell the difference. Besides nailing the banter, several of his one-liners were classic, laugh-out-loud Palladino. On the downside, like his predecessors, he overestimates viewers' appetite for one Taylor Doose.
He's a fan of Luke and Lorelai.
Now I'm not going to lie to you: The episode is going to be a tough one for Luke and Lorelai fans to watch. Really tough. Based on how the season ended - and the fact that Rosenthal confirmed to me last week that Lorelai and Christopher did indeed have sex - that much was a given. But I think he handled the fallout from Christophergate with unbelievable grace and dignity - particularly as it pertains to Luke and Lorelai as a couple. Let me put it this way: The episode left no doubt in my mind that Lorelai and Luke are meant for each other.
He'll always have Paris.
Liza Weil told me herself at the CW party last week that Rosenthal had given her her longest scene ever in the premiere - and she wasn't exaggerating. It's six pages! But it's not the length that stood out, it's the way Rosenthal managed to capture Paris' trademark vim, vigor and bite. Plus, I can't think of a more perfect business venture for Rory's sometime roommate than an SAT-prep course. The possibilities for clashes with stupidity are endless!
He's a hopeless romantic.
And Logan and Rory fans will be swooning as a result. Sure, the episode finds them on opposite continents, but Rosenthal has found a way to bring them closer together than I think they've ever been. All I'll say is his method is sweet, utterly romantic, and it ties in with the episode title "The Long Morrow." And the end result should put Matt Czuchry fans' mind at ease (at least for the short term).
Other scoopy treats from the episode: