Man, David Benioff and D.B. Weiss are some ruthless MFers. The Game of Thrones showrunners who brought George R.R. Martin's "anyone can die at at any time" ethos to TV have revealed a shocking off-screen death: King Tommen's (Dean-Charles Chapman) beloved cat Ser Pounce has gone to the big litter box in the sky, they tongue-in-cheekily told Entertainment Weekly.
"Cersei (Lena Headey) hated the name 'Ser Pounce' so much she could not allow him to survive," Benioff told EW about the fate of the late young king's fan-favorite feline, last seen in Season 6. "So she came up with her most diabolical [execution]. Ser Pounce's death was so horrible we couldn't even put it on the air."
I know he's joking, but I bet if pressed he could actually very quickly come up with a really brutal, character-appropriate way of skinning a cat. Like she had a member of the Queensguard burn it with wildfire, and that's just the start.
"If you buy the super-extended, super-charged Game of Thrones box set that comes out, the death of Ser Pounce will be in there," Weiss added. "Just one whole episode devoted to the death of Ser Pounce."
What if they really did that, though? What if that 55-night shoot was all devoted to filming a kitty getting killed? They hired Miguel Sapochnik to make it as bone-crunchingly violent and epic as possible. HBO gave them $50 billion an episode and that's how they chose to spend it. And then people mass-canceled their HBO subscriptions in protest and the network went out of business and Elizabeth Warren made Showtime picking up Ballers part of her campaign platform. What if all that happened? That's my dream.
Game of Thrones' Ser Pounce-less eighth and final season premieres Sunday, April 14 at 9/8c on HBO.