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Toast of London Season 2 Episodes
Season 2 Episode Guide
6 Episodes 2014 - 2014
Episode 1
Match Fit
23 mins
Reduced to recording 'Mind the Gap' for Boris Johnson and playing Charles Dickens on a sight-seeing bus tour with a single, stroppy passenger Steven is happy to enter the River Rats' Celebrities and Prostitutes blow football charity match. Whilst Mrs Purchase happily has sex with him as her husband sleeps she cannot partner Steven as she will be playing alongside Ray and points Steven towards the experienced Wendy Nook. The final is between Steven and Wendy and the Purchases and it looks as if Steven is going to lose until Ralph Fiennes makes an important announcement which changes everything.
Episode 2
Desperate Measures
23 mins
Fed up with voice-overs Steven turns down a children's show - recalling an awkward moment in the past - and falls out with a gun-toting director. After Purchase has ratted on him to the tax people he agrees to helm the stage version of 'Calendar Girls' after the director has supposedly died. His aggressive attitude toward the female cast gets him sacked and there is worse to come when one of them offers him a lift home. The only way to pay off the bill is to travel to the Congo to advertise Red Carpet cigarettes.
Episode 3
The Moose Trap
23 mins
Over-tired after recording an all night voice-over session of SatNav for the Elderly, Steven goes on radio's 'Woman's Hour' to discuss his role as Inspector Attenborough in Anthea Crippen's long-running play 'The Moose Trap.' Sadly, he reveals the name of the murderer, and is universally shunned when the play is forced to close. He is optimistic when soldier brother Blair suggests he audition as the announcer on 'University Challenge,' but after he has caused Jeremy Paxman to fall out of a window, the job goes to Ray Purchase.
Episode 4
High Winds Actor
23 mins
When Steven's friend Axel Jacklin, Britain's best actor at performing in front of a wind machine, dies Steven's agent Jane puts him up for the leading role in a period maritime drama and he proves that he can withstand the machine. However he must be a Freemason to secure the part and makes a hurried trip to the East End to buy his way into the initiation ceremony. He is duly accepted but unfortunately one of the masons officiating is Ray Purchase, who ensures that everybody knows Steven only joined to get the part and loses it for him.
Episode 5
Buried Alive
23 mins
After discovering that ex-wife Ellen is to marry potato crisps magnate Sterling Porrich Steven gets a role in a Hollywood blockbuster alongside crazy super-star Max Gland. However the role involves him being buried alive and he is left underground when the crew disappears. Thanks to his wonderful new phone he is able to record a voice-over for Porrich's crisps long distance and, after being rescued as a result of fracking, takes suitable revenge on his rival.
Episode 6
Fool in Love
23 mins
Toast finds himself having to move out from his digs while Ed's niece, Honeysuckle, comes to stay. Honeysuckle has come down to get homeopathy treatment for an allergy which is more close to demonic possession. Toast also learns the love of his life and the woman that broke his heart is back in town appearing in a west end show. While moving out of Ed's to stay with Francis Bacon "I thought he was dead?", Toast bumps into her and they look like they might get back together or is there another reason that she is plotting and will she only break Toast's heart again. And will Ed's niece be cured or saved by the home visit of Alan, the homeopathy geezer.
