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10 Episodes 1966 - 1967
Episode 1
29 mins
As the Garnetts celebrate Christmas, Alf berates Rita and Mike for only giving him "Whiffs" instead of real cigars, and second-rate socks when they have bought Else a dress; and he accuses his atheist son-in-law of hypocrisy. Rita cannot recall his gift of a dollhouse when she was little--because Alf fell down the stairs and broke it while he was drunk. When the carolers arrive, Alf is ready for them--with a vase of dirty water. Which he must drink when he sees the vicar heading the singers.
Episode 2
31 mins
The sexual morals of the youth of the mid-1960s are far from acceptable to pedagogue Alf, and when his daughter Rita's virtue is questioned by his socialist son-in-law Mike, the predictable explosion occurs.
Episode 3
Pipe smoker Alf reluctantly accepts a challenge from his long-haired socialist son-in-law Mike to give up smoking. Else and Rita are both pleased, but which of the men will crack under the strain first?
Episode 4
In yet another political argument, this time about the war in Vietnam, Alf declares that all protesters are Communists. However, when a lorry driver parks his vehicle outside Alf's house and refuses to move it, Alf indulges in a little protest of his own.
Episode 5
When Mike loses his job and must sign on the dole, Alf is suspicious because he offers to give him more money for the rent. It turns out that he has an extra five pounds of payment in his National Assistance, but he must give most of it to Alf as increased rent.
Episode 6
Alf gets home late from work and finds that his dinner has burned to a crisp in the oven. Else tells him that Mike is at the chip shop and if he phones through to him, it will not be too late for Alf to place his own order. However, Alf is thwarted by others trying to use the phone box.
Episode 7
Alf returns home full of pride: he's bought a portrait photograph of the Duke of Windsor and he astonishes his family by telling him that his late father was a personal friend and drinking companion of the Duke; also, the Duke is an ardent supporter of Alf's beloved West Ham United.
Episode 8
30 mins
Alf is in hospital for a short stay and he is not a model patient. Uncomfortable with a Black nurse, he defies hygiene by trying to clean out his pipe with a syringe. To make matters worse, he gets a visit from relatives, something he can truly do without.
Episode 9
27 mins
Learning that the Socialist prime minister he despises, Harold Wilson, is hosting the Russian premier, Alf is appalled, seeing this as yet another example of Wilson's selling out to Communism. He decides to go to Downing Street to protest, then head to Buckingham Palace so that the Queen can see his patriotism.
Episode 10
30 mins
Alf has a stomach bug, but Else has blocked the toilet with tea leaves, so he must keep going next door. After decrying immigrants for bringing in diseases, Alf learns that he is carrying a contagious bug himself and must go into hospital. Rita and Mike gleefully burn his copy of "Clean Up TV" by Mary Whitehouse to prevent further contamination.