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19 Episodes 1980 - 1981
Episode 22
Thu, Oct 16, 198043 mins
Two segments are devoted to new products found by the staff, including various toys and gift ideas intended for Christmas, such as a football with a light inside, a Coke bottle radio, and different talking toys for children, as well as a bikini with solar-powered propellers. Buddy Hackett talks about doing a revival of the game show "You Bet Your Life", noting how exhausting and disorienting it is to tape several shows a day. Johnny then compliments him about his surprisingly wide knowledge on numerous subjects, and Hackett discusses snakes. He says that his expertise on the topic came from his time in the Boy Scouts, and he recalls some of that background; he also discusses nutrition, and the difference between terms such as organic and natural. He then talks and jokes about various topics including his wife's psychic fair, and experiences with ghosts. Dr. Morris Goldberg is a dentist in Dayton, Ohio who also has a chauffeur service. He got into the business because he bought a Rolls Royce as an investment, but didn't get to use it often. He tells stories about the business.
Episode 23
Fri, Oct 31, 1980
Johnny does his last poll of the audience on the following Tuesday's election. Since it is Halloween, characters trick-or-treat at the door behind Johnny's desk throughout the show, including a John Anderson lookalike. Bob Hope first talks about his special airing the next night in which he runs for the presidency, and clips are shown, including outtakes of Johnny. He mentions that he has turned down opportunities to run for office, then talks about some of the presidents he has known and their varying senses of humor. Steve Landesberg talks about the presidential race and does impressions, including Gregory Peck as a presidential candidate, Jimmy Stewart being president, and George C. Scott turning down a Nobel Peace Prize. He then comments on the dubious claims in tell-all books and sensational biographies, and wonders how anyone can tell when someone is lying. He also talks about going back to doing stand-up during the actors' strike, and how he enjoys it in small doses such as single nights at colleges. Gore Vidal and Johnny talk about politics and the presidential election. They discuss why voter turnout is only about half the eligible voters, and Vidal endorses the idea of a new constitutional convention and parliamentary system of government, since he feels the current system is controlled by corporate interests. Asked about religion in politics, he suggests that religious groups should not be tax exempt.
Episode 36
Wed, Nov 19, 198090 mins
The comedy segment is little-known names of common things. Ricky Schroder talks about his activities over the summer, traveling to Mexico and England, where he made the movie Little Lord Fauntleroy with Alec Guinness. He mentions getting in some trouble after giving the same poem to two girls. He tells Johnny a riddle, and then mentions a vacation at Grossinger's resort in the Catskills, where Johnny once performed. He also says he never took acting lessons, and admits to being superstitious. When asked what else he might like to do when he grows up, he says he'd like to play baseball for the Yankees. Sean Morey does a stand-up comedy routine that also includes juggling, and concludes by juggling a rubber chicken, a head of lettuce and an M&M. Jeana Tomasino is the Playboy Playmate for November 1980. She tells how she became a Playmate, saying she had been modeling in Chicago, and many people encouraged her to apply. When she decided to do so, she had her boyfriend - who worked for Playboy - submit her, but he did not give her the $1,000 finder's fee. She says she was very skinny in high school and never thought she could be chosen. Her father (a Wisconsin firefighter) and family supported her posing nude. She talks about her upcoming role in "Looker", and recalls doing TV commercials for Coppertone, Lincoln-Mercury, Canada Dry and Dittos blue jeans; she is now rehearsing with the Playmates singing group.
Episode 47
Tue, Dec 30, 198090 mins
Episode 47
Tue, Dec 30, 198090 mins
Episode 52
Thu, Dec 11, 198043 mins
The comedy segment is children's letters to Santa Claus, forwarded from the NY General Post Office. Jimmy Stewart talks about his Christmas plans, and discusses his special "Mr. Krueger's Christmas", which he did for the Mormon church; he says the experience of conducting the Mormon Tabernacle Choir was overwhelming. Then he talks about getting a hearing aid. He then reads a poem he wrote about his Super 8 movie camera - from the camera's point of view - which was wrecked by a hyena during a family safari in Kenya. Hodding Carter discusses his former job of being the State Department spokesman, noting the difficulty of withholding sensitive information from the public while attempting as much openness as possible. He notes that he learned of the failed attempt to rescue the Iranian hostages only when a flight attendant expressed her condolences, and says that he accepts the aggressive nature of the press as a necessary factor.
Episode 94
Thu, Jan 8, 198190 mins
McLean Stevenson talks about having gotten married a month earlier, to one of the show's talent coordinators, and recalls that it was Johnny who introduced them. It is his first time on the show as a married man. He talks about their living arrangements: he had an apartment, and bought a house which he was renovating, and she had a condo. When she saw the house, the budget to improve it greatly expanded. In the comedy segment, Johnny plays G. Walter Schneer, spokesman for the insurance industry, explaining their policies. James Woods talks about also being newly married, for four months. He tells his views about how to make the marriage work, and discusses changes in his behavior. He believes that marriages often fail because of a lack of trust. Johnny offers his own observations on marital communication, but concedes that they have not worked very well for him. Stevenson then comments (with some apprehension) that he has not yet met his in-laws. Former Houston Oilers coach Bum Phillips talks a bit about getting fired after three playoff appearances, and comments on rumors of him becoming coach of the New Orleans Saints. Johnny asks about instant replay; Phillips says there will likely be problems with it, partially because of infractions that aren't noticed until a second viewing. He says that his mother complains when he uses bad language; he also says that the toughest part of coaching is cutting players, and tried to apply that understanding to his own firing. He comments on being away from his wife for extended periods, and also tells the origin of his nickname "Bum" (his given name being Oail, which no one could pronounce).
Episode 94
Thu, Jan 8, 198190 mins
McLean Stevenson talks about having gotten married a month earlier, to one of the show's talent coordinators, and recalls that it was Johnny who introduced them. It is his first time on the show as a married man. He talks about their living arrangements: he had an apartment, and bought a house which he was renovating, and she had a condo. When she saw the house, the budget to improve it greatly expanded. In the comedy segment, Johnny plays G. Walter Schneer, spokesman for the insurance industry, explaining their policies. James Woods talks about also being newly married, for four months. He tells his views about how to make the marriage work, and discusses changes in his behavior. He believes that marriages often fail because of a lack of trust. Johnny offers his own observations on marital communication, but concedes that they have not worked very well for him. Stevenson then comments (with some apprehension) that he has not yet met his in-laws. Former Houston Oilers coach Bum Phillips talks a bit about getting fired after three playoff appearances, and comments on rumors of him becoming coach of the New Orleans Saints. Johnny asks about instant replay; Phillips says there will likely be problems with it, partially because of infractions that aren't noticed until a second viewing. He says that his mother complains when he uses bad language; he also says that the toughest part of coaching is cutting players, and tried to apply that understanding to his own firing. He comments on being away from his wife for extended periods, and also tells the origin of his nickname "Bum" (his given name being Oail, which no one could pronounce).
Episode 128
Wed, Feb 25, 198190 mins
Johnny reads a list of security tips from the NBC security chief "Pops Himmler", a piece that he doesn't think goes well. Barbara Eden brings a clip from her new series "Harper Valley P.T.A.", based on her popular earlier TV movie. Bobby Kelton performs a stand-up set. Cartoonist Arnold Roth exhibits some of his unusual works.
Episode 133
Wed, Mar 4, 198190 mins
The comedy segment is Walter Cronkite's last news broadcast. David Brenner does a stand-up comedy routine. He says his first appearance on The Tonight Show was ten years earlier. Brenner then says that when he was starting out, he would go to the show's open auditions to get free food. He and Johnny trade stories about being asked for autographs by fans. Christie Brinkley talks about being on the cover of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue, and the work of modeling. She also talks about how she was recruited to modeling while in Paris. She has done 100 magazine covers. Johnny also points out Brooke Shields sitting in the audience.
Episode 143
Wed, Mar 18, 198142 mins
Instead of the planned comedy segment, after the monologue Johnny mentions watching a PBS special that discussed a bird (the swift) that flies continuously for the first three years of its life. Ed counters by claiming that sharks never stop swimming, though Johnny is doubtful, with the audience weighing in on varying sides. Richard Benjamin first talks about caring for his son's goldfish, and the nuisances of pets that die quickly - or defy expectations of doing so. He then talks about the film he is currently directing, "My Favorite Year". Noting that Benjamin's wife is an actress who also is often away from home, Johnny asks if he does much of the housework to adjust for their schedules; Benjamin says he does a lot of the work, as he doesn't think his wife is thorough enough when washing dishes, so he sneaks downstairs overnight to rewash them. He also complains that she buys their kids clothes that fit perfectly, meaning he'll just have to buy more when they grow out of them quickly. Garry Shandling does a stand-up comedy routine; Johnny notes that this is his first appearance on "The Tonight Show" and on network television. Afterward Johnny predicts the public "will be hearing a lot" from Shandling in the future. Golfer Jan Stephenson first talks about the furor over her posing for some attention-getting photos, and how views are constantly changing about how men's and women's sports are marketed with sex appeal; she believes that many male golfers also draw fans the same way. She also tells how she got into the sport; she concentrated on tennis at first, but decided golf must be better since her father kept going off to play golf. She originally wanted to be a surfer, with her father promising her surfboard if she got her handicap down to her age by her 13th birthday - but when she got it down to 12 just in time, she decided she'd rather get a sand wedge than a surfboard. She also talks about the businesses she has, and runs herself. Finally, she explains why she prefers to keep her Australian citizenship, though she lives in the US.
Episode 157
Tue, Apr 7, 1981
There is no comedy segment. It is Johnny's first show after hosting the Oscars, which were postponed by a day following the attempt to assassinate President Reagan; Johnny comments on the crisis, and gives a positive report on the recovery of press secretary Jim Brady, who was critically wounded. Ed talks about driving cross-country during the break, and explains why it is ideal to go through small towns rather than big cities. He says that he watched the Oscars in a small Louisiana town, and talks about being recognized at campgrounds. Also mentioned is some very successful golfing by director Bobby Quinn, who won the Greater Greensboro Pro-Am teamed with Gary Player, and producer Fred de Cordova, who shot his first hole-in-one. Suzanne Pleshette talks about how her new TV movie, "The Star Maker", is being produced by Johnny's company, with Ed among the cast, and how Johnny visited filming at a cemetery one day. She also discusses dealing with the height difference of over a foot between herself and leading man Rock Hudson. Johnny asks how her husband feels about her doing love scenes with handsome men, and she says he was jealous the first year, but then adjusted by getting to know her co-stars. Dick Cavett talks about his new historical documentary series "Remember When", and discusses various trivia and quirky facts, such as the inventor of the modern brassiere, and another famous figure who pursued different occupations late in his life. Cavett then notes that in 1980 Americans drove enough to make six billion trips to the moon. He also tells the story of the first joke of his that Johnny used when Cavett was one of his writers in 1964, and discusses the awkwardness of foreign interviews. Then they discuss anagrams of their names and those of celebrities, and other stories about odd words.
Episode 159
Thu, Apr 9, 198142 mins
The comedy segment is Carnac the Magnificent. Next, Johnny and Ed have a lengthy discussion about whether some sharks do not need to keep moving to live; when previously discussed, Johnny said yes and Ed had thought not, but now Johnny has a letter from oceanographers backing him up. Ed irritates Johnny by saying that he had only argued that some sharks - not all - swim continuously. Albert Brooks talks about the grind of promoting his film "Modern Romance", and then he discusses the film. This leads to a discussion about relationships between men and women, as Johnny asks his opinion on various related issues. Brooks keeps his answers humorous. A clip from the film is shown. Susan Sarandon says she tries to avoid caring about reviews. Johnny turns the topic back to male-female relationships, and she suggests it is good for women to be a mystery to men. She gives a quiz on the topic to Johnny and Albert. Johnny mentions how Sarandon won the Canadian equivalent of the Oscar. She then tells about learning clam shucking and blackjack dealing for the film "Atlantic City"; a clip from the film is shown.
Episode 160
Fri, Apr 10, 198190 mins
During the spot for the comedy segment, Johnny talks about staying up overnight to see the first Space Shuttle launch, which was postponed. Robert Blake - a last minute fill-in for Dolly Parton, who has laryngitis - first talks about trying to quit chewing tobacco, since he has quit smoking. He then talks about his TV movies as the character Joe Dancer not being successful because they are always run against major specials. He also says his pride prevents him from kowtowing to network executives for better treatment, and discusses his combativeness with NBC's Brandon Tartikoff. He talks about his tendency toward extremes, including an inclination to road rage. Next comes a sketch with Johnny as an IRS spokesperson explaining policies and procedures. Calvin Trillin talks about his new book, and then Johnny asks about the groups that are editing what is in libraries; Trillin admits to mixed feelings, questioning if the First Amendment should apply to Hustler magazine. He and Johnny also talk about politics and General Haig.
Episode 188
Wed, May 20, 198143 mins
For the comedy segment, Johnny and Ed first discuss a letter received about the previous night's conversation regarding the effect of a full moon on people. The sender suggests that even when cloudy, a full moon reflects other frequencies of radiation from the sun that affect people by simulating a fever; however, a full moon has no effect on tides, as the moon remains the same size. Ed is skeptical, and pokes fun at the sender's credentials. Johnny then presents little-known names for various common objects - the first set real, then scripted ones. George Carlin does a stand-up routine. During his interview, he complains about conversational banalities including "take it easy", and lists various causes he is involved with, such as parakeet menopause, battered plants, and hors d'oeuvres for Bangladesh. Richard Pryor does not do a stand-up routine; during his interview, he says that he has mostly recovered from the burns he suffered in his June 1980 accident. He talks about starting out in Greenwich Village at the same time as Carlin, and how he stole material from Dick Gregory and Bill Cosby's acts. Asked the worst place he played, he says L.A. County Jail, where he did 10 days for not paying taxes. Before showing a clip from "Bustin' Loose", in which he plays a thief, he talks about being caught stealing by his father. Johnny recalls how he was caught stealing a ring from a dime store as a child. Pryor mentions that he was caught stealing coffee that he didn't need. After the clip, Johnny asks what movies Pryor likes to see, and he says that he is excited about "Superman II".
Episode 209
Thu, Jun 18, 198142 mins
Carnac the Magnificent appears, in a segment that goes particularly well. Jim Fowler brings out four wolf cubs; he discusses their endangered status in the wild, and after tumbling around the stage they compete aggressively over some chicken wings. Next, Fowler brings out a Celebes ape named Doc; the monkey is quite rambunctious, knocking over tables and chairs. At one point it shoves Johnny in the chest, knocking him backwards, and then hits Johnny in the mouth; Johnny responds with some mock karate moves, and after Fowler tells him to feed the monkey some grapes, Johnny snarls and tauntingly eats them in front of the animal. Finally, Fowler brings out an aardvark which Johnny describes as a particularly ugly creature. It knocks Johnny's mug off his desk, rooting in it for a drink, and after Fowler leads it to a sandbox to demonstrate how it burrows, the animal leaves a large deposit in the sand. David Steinberg begins by commenting on the previous segments and discusses his fear of snakes. He talks about the prevalence of cosmetic surgery in California, and briefly discusses editing the upcoming movie he directed, "Paternity", which he says has kept him from performing before an audience for a year. Finally, he talks at length about his impressions of the royal wedding of Prince Charles and Lady Diana.
Episode 214
Thu, Jun 25, 198190 mins
The comedy segment is Floyd R. Turbo, American, discussing the air traffic controllers' threat to strike. However, Johnny can not keep a straight face, and ends the sketch abruptly. McLean Stevenson recalls how he botched his easy line the very first time he got in a Broadway play after seven months as an understudy, then absent-mindedly swore. He then talks about how his 1972 Porsche was hit four times in 35 days, once from each side. He comments on going to the bank to get his wife's name on his checks, and the teller telling him she wants to sing on "The Tonight Show". He then talks about the program he is on to cut down his smoking. He then announces that he and his wife Ginny, a former Tonight Show employee, are expecting a baby. Bob Uecker talks about the baseball players' strike, joking about how little he made as a player. He suggests paying players at all levels, starting with $10,000 in Little League, saying that fans will gradually not notice the high salaries of major leaguers. He also jokes about making public appearances to replace the income he is losing due to the strike. More seriously, he points out that the longer the strike goes on, the longer it will take for players to get in shape to return.
Episode 235
Fri, Jul 24, 198190 mins
Ed interviews a Mediterranean fruit fly. Michael Landon (Little House on the Prairie (1974)); Bo Derek (Tarzan the Ape Man (1981)).
Episode 239
Fri, Jul 31, 198190 mins
Angie Dickinson is the first guest. Johnny first asks her about being whistled at on the street; she takes it as a compliment, but is careful to note whether the whistling is directed at her or someone else - an error which has caused her some embarrassment in the past. She then tells how that afternoon Ed had walked in on her at the beauty parlor - she tried to hide, since she feels being seen in rollers is the least attractive look. She and Johnny then discuss the difference between sexy and sensual. Asked about sensual men, she names Robert Mitchum. Then Tommy Lasorda comes out as a surprise guest. He talks about the resumption of baseball from the strike, as its conclusion has just been announced. Next comes the comedy segment: Johnny as hospital industry spokesman G. Walter Schneer, who explains medical terminology, priorities and procedures. Dom DeLuise notes that it is his birthday, since it's past midnight, and talks about getting old and thinking of mortality, and losing weight. He then talks at length about the royal wedding of Prince Charles and Diana Spencer, and compares it to his own. He recalls how quickly his wife agreed to marry him, and this leads to him asking Dickinson about marriage proposals. He then talks about his early days in New York City living in a cold water flat. Dickinson says she has never seen a cold water flat, or a walk-up, since she has always lived in California since childhood.
Episode 242
Thu, Aug 6, 198142 mins
The comedy segment is about famous last words - first real ones, then suggested ones for celebrities. Erma Bombeck first talks about flying during the ongoing air traffic controllers' strike. Johnny then asks about phobias, and she admits to having some claustrophobia. She then talks about the new TV series she is producing, "Maggie". Johnny asks about commercials, and she complains about the unrealistic depiction of housewives. This leads to a discussion of husbands and leftover food. Johnny asks John Travolta about a wide variety of topics: Getting his qualification as a jet pilot and captain, though he couldn't work for an airline since he didn't graduate high school; his desire to be an actor since he was very young; and his admiration and friendship with Jimmy Cagney. Johnny asks further about leaving high school, and Travolta explains that since he knew he wanted to be an actor, and was already working professionally, he wanted to get his career going quicker. Johnny also asks about how fame has affected his life, and Travolta says it changes things but doesn't bother him - it feels natural. He then talks about his movie "Blow Out", and a clip is shown. Asked what he wants to do in ten years, Travolta suggests directing, but says his main goal is to maintain happiness.
Episode 248
Fri, Aug 14, 198143 mins
Betty White, in her first TV appearance after the death of her husband Allen Ludden some two months earlier, plays Jane to Carson's Tarzan (Tommy Newsom has a walk-on as Boy) in a comedy sketch directly parodying Bo Derek's version of "Tarzan the Ape Man", which has just been released and later became known as one of the worst movies of all time.