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36 Episodes 1958 - 1959
Episode 1
Tue, Sep 23, 1958
Bilko gambles on the purchase of an Army surplus crate with undisclosed contents. It contains a hidden map to a gold mine in Grove City, California, which results in the personnel of Ft. Baxter, in its entirety, transferring from Roseville, Kansas to Camp Fremont in California, which has been closed for years.
Episode 2
Wed, Oct 1, 195830 mins
Ritzik leaves Bilko's poker sessions early to watch his favorite horror movies. Bilko convinces Ritzik that he's a vampire. Hollywood is looking for a new horror movie star and Bilko tries to convince them he has just the man for the job.
Episode 3
Wed, Oct 8, 1958
Bilko invests money in a broken down coach and plans to fix it up and set up a coach travel service for GI's. When the railroad offers a cheaper deal, The Bilko Bus Company decides to offer deluxe tours of California.
Episode 4
Wed, Oct 15, 1958
When Bilko gets his hands on a surplus of burlap sacking he spots a money-making opportunity when he thinks he can talk the Pentagon into making the new-issue army uniforms from burlap.
Episode 5
Wed, Oct 22, 1958
Bilko's rival Sgt.Covington's dances and poker nights start proving more popular than Bilko's & Ernie starts an all-out war. It's not long before the battling Sgt.'s are pulling out all the stops and using every dirty trick in the book.
Episode 6
Tue, Oct 28, 1958
Bilko takes Paparelli and Zimmerman to San Diego on furlough - but only because they have some money. $7 obviously isn't going to go far but with the Navy back in town Bilko soon hears about a no limits crap game. The three of them borrow some Navy uniforms from the Army & Navy store and infiltrate the game. Just as Bilko wins about $4,000 the game is broke up by the Navy MPs, the money is confiscated and the men sent back to their ships. Bilko, Paparelli and Zimmerman then have to come clean and face jail or go to sea and try and work out what to do from there. Alaska is next stop on the route!
Episode 7
Wed, Nov 5, 1958
Bilko falls head-over-heels in love after he's trapped in an elevator with a beautiful woman. He's desperate to find her but it seems it can't find anyone who can help him find his mystery girl.
Episode 8
Wed, Nov 12, 1958
Pvt.Lindsay Crosby arrives at Camp Fremont and Bilko learns that he's the son of Bing Crosby. Bilko begins to imagine what life would be like if he, rather than Bing, was head of the Crosby clan.
Episode 9
Wed, Nov 19, 195830 mins
Bilko uses Col. Hall's tax refund for his own purposes. He develops an allergy to playing cards and has to give up poker. The doctor discovers that Bilko is suffering from a guilt complex over the way he treated Colonel Hall.
Episode 10
Wed, Nov 26, 1958
Bilko is sent to San Francisco & the Col. asks the Chaplain to accompany him. The Chaplain takes Bilko to see his pet project - a center for military kids. Bilko realizes that the Chaplain has been duped by a crooked real estate dealer.
Episode 11
Wed, Dec 3, 1958
Bilko stages a concert with some of Hollywood's biggest names - Frank Sinatra, Kim Novak and The McGuire Sisters. The names are famous but the faces aren't. When Doberman sends a letter the real McGuire Sisters arrive at Camp Fremont.
Episode 12
Wed, Dec 10, 1958
Bilko is sent to Yucca Flats to work on a nuclear test program. Ritzik is magnetized by one of the scientists machines. They skip the base and head for Las Vegas where Rupert is keen to demonstrate out his 'attractive' gambling skills.
Episode 13
Wed, Dec 17, 195830 mins
Bilko wins $25,000 in prizes. When he has to pay taxes on his winnings he comes up with a way to dispose of the prizes and starts his own quiz show in Grove City. All is going well until Doberman becomes a big hit with the audience.
Episode 14
Mon, Dec 22, 195830 mins
Bilko needs $500 to open a pool room. He hears the Ritziks have been visiting medium Madame Zaboda for advice & spots the chance to make money. When he finds out that Emma & Rupert are being conned he sets out to take down Madame Zaboda.
Episode 15
Fri, Jan 2, 1959
When jazz musician Skinny Sanders arrives at Camp Fremont, he keeps Bilko and the platoon awake with his music. Bilko is about to have him transferred to Alaska when he finds out that Skinny is actually a famous jazz musician.
Episode 16
Fri, Jan 9, 195930 mins
Hollywood star Monica Malamar is ordered to clean up her image & embarks on a romance with Bilko. When he reaches Hollywood he plays the shy, country boy but it's not long before he's up to his scheming tricks.
Episode 17
Fri, Jan 23, 195960 mins
Bilko learns that a movie is to be made about him - but just who will play him?
Episode 18
Wed, Jan 28, 1959
Bilko invests $300 in a run-down hotel. Chester Hilton is voted president of the hotel and Bilko calls it The Grove City Hilton, hoping that the Hilton group will want to buy out his hotel in order to keep the good name of their business.
Episode 19
Wed, Feb 4, 1959
When Bilko is unable to pay the restaurant bill on a date he tries to take out a credit card and is refused. He sets up the GI's Gourmet a Diners Club credit card for the soldiers of Camp Fremont. But is Bilko onto a winner?
Episode 20
Wed, Feb 11, 195930 mins
Bilko, Doberman, Zimmerman, and Paparelli are on a 3-day pass for some wild fun in Tijuana. A gang of bandits robs them of their money and something even more valuable - their uniforms and identification papers.
Episode 21
Wed, Feb 18, 195930 mins
Col. Hall is furious when he's passed over for promotion. Bilko decides to give the Col.'s promotion chances a boost by getting him into the President's golfing foursome and it's not long before John Hall is mixing it with the President.
Episode 22
Wed, Feb 25, 195930 mins
Bilko finds a new prospect in WAC Polly Porter. She's a crack shot with a rifle and Bilko sets out to promote her as the new Annie Oakley... but love rears its head and threatens to thwart Bilko's plans.
Episode 23
Wed, Mar 4, 195930 mins
Pvt. Jenkins dumps his hooch in the engine of a jeep. When he gets some of the mix on his face he looks younger. Bilko asks the beauty industry to buy the miracle cream. All looks good until they discover it has some unusual ingredients.
Episode 24
Wed, Mar 18, 1959
A fitness instructor is placed in Bilko's platoon. To get rid of him and to make some money, Bilko tries to get him cast in a Tarzan movie. To do this, Bilko tries to fix it so his man wins the Mr. Universe contest. First step: he hires a woman ('Lucille Ball' in a cameo appearance!) to scream when his man goes on stage. When this fails, he dresses Doberman up in a gorilla suit to fight his "Tarzan". Col. Hall sees the "gorilla" and soon has the whole camp hunting for him.
Episode 25
Wed, Mar 25, 195930 mins
A tough lieutenant gives Bilko and his platoon a hard time. When the lieutenant is transferred, Bilko decides to have someone from his own platoon promoted to officer status. Who better than mild-mannered Dino Paparelli?
Episode 26
Fri, Apr 3, 1959
Wanting the best for his godson Bilko tries to enroll him in the Stanford University class of '77. When he discovers that Stanford will only accept reservations from former students he has to find a way to enroll himself in the university.
Episode 27
Fri, Apr 17, 195930 mins
Colonel Hall tricks Bilko into subjecting himself to a secret experiment conducted by the Army. Unbeknownst to Bilko, he's being dosed with tranquilizers.
Episode 28
Fri, Apr 24, 1959
Bilko plots to make a fortune by picking up stock market tips, while serving as a butler at a high-society dinner.
Episode 29
Fri, May 1, 195930 mins
Emma Ritzik persuades Rupert to leave the army and get away from Bilko. Rupert buys a diner and when Bilko pays a visit he realizes that Ritzik has been duped into buying the run-down diner and sets out to get him his money back.
Episode 30
Fri, May 8, 195930 mins
Bilko opens a showroom selling sports cars of his own design made from Army jeep parts.
Episode 31
Fri, May 15, 195930 mins
Doberman is the long-lost heir of Lord and Lady Rockford, which means he's first in line to inherit fifty million dollars. Of course, Bilko has a plan to get in on the action.
Episode 32
Fri, May 22, 1959
Bilko establishes the only legal gambling casino in California. Everything is going fine, until a group of mobsters muscle their way in.
Episode 33
Fri, May 29, 195930 mins
During a heat wave, Sergeant Bilko schemes to be sent to a ski lodge in the Rockies for a rest cure. To do so, he first has to convince Colonel Hall that he needs to take his wife on a second honeymoon.
Episode 34
Fri, Jun 5, 195930 mins
Grover & Ritzik win $600 & Bilko wants their winnings. They hide from Bilko but are suckered into volunteering for a special detail involving a space chamber where they think they will be alone for three days. But Bilko has other plans.
Episode 35
Fri, Jun 12, 1959
Henshaw sets up Gamblers Anonymous at Camp Fremont. With no GI's left to bilk Ernie targets the WACs. When he sneaks into the WAC's quarters to pick up his loot their barracks are put into quarantine due to an outbreak of measles.
Episode 36
Wed, Jun 17, 195930 mins
Colonel Hall brings television to Camp Fremont so that he can monitor Bilko's gambling activities. Bilko's scams are all but over but then Colonel Hall goes away for the weekend with his wife to Lake Tahoe. A chance encounter brings Bilko and Charlie Clusterman together. Charlie is Colonel Hall's double and Bilko suddenly sees a way of getting his show taken off the air permanently. Not only that but Monte Carlo Night in the Officer's Club is now a real possibility.