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Here's What President Trump TV Could Look Like

Welcome to the boob tube

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Alexander Zalben

Welcome to Trump's America. I'd put a "this is the darkest timeline" GIF here, but frankly a smart, emotionally sensitive comedy like Community has no place in the new world ruled over by a mouth-eyed orange monster baby.

Here's what you get instead: nearly every other entertainment personality (and make no mistake, the ruler of the free world is now an entertainment personality) was against Trump, which means whatever the future of TV holds, it'll be with the dregs Trump dragged with him. So let's take a look in the crystal ball while we still can -- they'll probably be rounding up all the fortune tellers for practicing witchcraft any moment now! -- and see what the future of TV may be in our Brave New World:

Joe Piscopo's "Comedy" Update

Forget The Daily Show and Full Frontal: Joe Piscopo's skewed take on the government-approved news is here! Played every hour on the hour, the least funny SNL cast member of all time finally gets a platform to perform his... I guess we'd call them jokes, but really it's mostly weird grunts and strange, joyless laughing.

Baiowatch

The star of Charles in Charge is back on TV to bring you a sitcom with a message: Scott Baio is always watching. Every week, Baio hilariously notices something sort of suspicious about his neighbors, reports them, and next week he's got new neighbors. If you see something, Baio something!

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Getty Images


The New View

An all-male celebrity panel gets together every morning to discuss the biggest issues facing America's women. Lots of laughs, lots of fun, and lots of (all-male) celebrity guests! No women!

Married... To Children

Ted Nugent stars as a man who adopted a 17-year-old because he wasn't legally allowed to marry her. This is not a joke; he actually did this. Anyway, here's a TV show about it or whatever.

Community

You got six seasons, get ready for the movie! Watch as the cast of Community gets sent to an AmeroRussian commune to work until they die. Pop pop!

Editor's Note: This is (we hope obviously) a work of satire. None of these shows have been greenlit, or are in development. This article does not reflect the views of TVGuide.com, or its parent companies, and are the author's alone.

That said: entertainment reflects the world outside our window, and as of last night the world, if it didn't change, became much clearer through that window. Entertainment will also change accordingly, in two very distinct directions. Choose what you watch, what you support, with your viewing habits. There's more than one way to let the world know what kind of country you want America to be.