Once Upon a Timetook another break from its supposed theme of "the Land of Untold stories" on Sunday for a super quick rehash of a very familiar tale, the hit animated feature Aladdin. "Street Rats" featured song lyrics for dialogue, a crop top and hammer pants for Jasmine, and the flying carpet you remember from your childhood!
It's still not clear exactly how Aladdin (Deniz Akdeniz) got the carpet, but we do know now that he was the Savior of his world, the "Diamond in the Rough", the weapon needed to take down evil Vizier Jafar. Jasmine activated him by leading him to the cave of wonders, where he got his magic Savior powers so he could free her father and her from a giant hour glass and then basically commit to a lifelong mission of hunting down Jafar. Pretty sweet deal, right? Apparently not, because he used magical scissor-shears to snip away his powers and then hid in shame for the last six seasons.
Now that Jasmine (Karen David) and Aladdin have been reunited in Storybrooke, the first thing Jasmine has to say to him is that she needs his help to save Agrabah, again. Hmmm. Ever have that friend who only gets in touch when they need something? Jasmine might be that friend.
Meanwhile, the Evil Queen (Lana Parrilla) showed up in Archie's office to talk about, you guessed it, her obsession with Emma. When he refused to discuss a patient, she transmogrified into him and we were treated to Raphael Sbarge's best impression of Lana Parrilla.
She then made a beeline for Emma (Jennifer Morrison) in the hopes she could trick Emma into telling her all her hopes and dreams, and instead learned that Emma was keeping a secret from her family, so she wrangled her up into Snow & Charming's apartment and forced her to spill the beans. I am not sure why. I don't know how it benefits the Evil Queen's plans to make Emma break down her walls yet again, but she seemed pretty smug about it.
Smug enough to treat herself and Zelena (Rebecca Mader) to manicures while wearing caftans and towel turbans. Can you imagine being the manicurist across from these two queens chortling about how maybe they should have a threesome with Rumple and how much they love being wicked?
Meanwhile Emma was having a way less fun time with the reveal that ONCE AGAIN she was not telling everyone in her family every last one of her thoughts and feelings. Hook (Colin O'Donoghue) was being sulky and Snow (Ginnifer Goodwin) was full of chastisements.
And once again, ironically, while she's lecturing Emma on how to be honest, Charming is keeping the secret of his Daddy's coin from her, so uh oh.
Basically, while Snow said verbatim the same dialogue from Neverland, Regina was off being actually useful, racing around putting together a potion to find Aladdin so they could ask him how Emma could survive being the Savior. She even thoughtfully made it in the form of a cocktail, even though Emma had heavily implied that she thought Regina would ultimately be the hooded figure who took her life in her premonition of the season finale.
Of course, the potion led them directly to what they thought was Aladdin's corpse. Aladdin stepped out of hiding, and bequeathed his Savior-power-cutting shears to Emma. She, in turn, decided Hook should hide them from her so she would not be tempted to shrug off the burden of saving the lives of every Disney character ever.
Yes, Hook has decided to one-up Emma by wrapping a secret in a lie and keeping the latest MacGuffin on his person. Except in this one instance, in this one and only instance, I am going to go ahead and give him a pass because honestly I would do the same thing. If I loved someone and they felt compelled to put their neck on the line for every random fairy tale figure that had ever marched in the Disney Electrical Parade, I would probably use those shears too.
So, I am sure Hook's deceptive secret will come back to haunt us all in myriad complicated ways, but I actually can't fault him. Emma needs a break from running around saving people. Hell, she needed a break from it about three seasons ago.
-Were you happy with the Aladdin and Jasmine romance or do you feel cheated out of a magic carpet ride?
-Is Emma keeping secrets or just having a private life?
-What do you wear when you go with your wicked sister for a manicure? Full winged eyeliner and a kimono?
-Would you use the shears if you were Emma?
Once Upon a Time airs Sundays at 8/7c on ABC.