Machete Machete

Uh, wow. Robert Rodriguez's Mexploitation-inspired Machete might seem, at first glance, to have a limited audience. It's about a Mexican man who kills his enemies with, yes, machetes, and is an offshoot from Grindhouse, the Rodriguez-Quentin Tarantino collaboration that did only slightly better box office than the cult classics that inspired it. But the Machete trailer Rodriguez cheekily released to coincide with Cinco de Mayo suggests his film may have something for almost everyone. To wit:

Losties: Show veterans Michelle Rodriguez, Jeff Fahey and Cheech Marin have key roles.

Arizonans: The new trailer thoughtfully opens with a "special Cinco de Mayo message" to the Grand Canyon state, where a new law designed to stop illegal immigration has been denounced as racial profiling.

Fans of Nash Bridges: Don Johnson plays some kind of lawman, and his Nash Bridges co-star, Marin, plays a priest who helps Danny Trejo's main character, the titular Machete, seek revenge.

Lindsay Lohan fans: Lohan looks good as a pistol-packing nun, or at least a woman dressed as one. Between this and Linda Lovelace, give her credit for taking on interesting roles.

Film buffs: After playing a troubled man who wanted to assassinate a politician in Taxi Driver, Robert De Niro now plays a politician who's the target of an assassin. Full circle.

People who like Jessica Alba, Steven Seagal, motorcycles, and machetes: Yes, they're all here. We haven't seen a trailer so stuffed with jaw-droppers since the one for Sex and the City 2.

Watch the Machete trailer, courtesy of Ain't It Cool News: