In this week's scathing cover story, the National Enquirer alleges that Three's Company alum Suzanne Somers secretly underwent liposuction in a Beverly Hills clinic on Feb. 20. The tabloid article includes photos of a supposedly post-surgery Somers who's authored four diet books and hawked countless ThighMaster gadgets being escorted to her car by a nurse. It also quotes sassy fitness guru Jack LaLanne as asking: "So what happened to her system? It must not be working for her! This is the extreme in hypocrisy. She's let down all her fans, admirers and customers." Somers's publicist, Sandi Mendelson, would only tell TV Guide Online: "We're really not going to make any comments. We don't want to spend any more energy on this and dignify this."