He Was Only a Bathing Suit Salesman

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A young bathing-suit salesman meets in Washington a girl whom he flirts with in front of the Capitol. He finally persuades her to let him call. They become engaged; the next day he phones her that he needs go to Baltimore for several days, after which he would like to meet her in Philadelphia where they will be married. She consents. But, while in Baltimore, like all salesmen, he spies a lady on the street and follows her. Later he takes her out to dine. Several days later, he meets his fiancée in Philadelphia. They are married and leave for New York where they take up housekeeping. His wife's mother--who, by the way, is the pretty lady with whom her husband flirted and had out to dine--drops her daughter a note telling her that she is coming to visit her, also that in order to play a joke on her son-in-law, she had a caricature portrait made of herself to disgust her husband. The daughter receives the portrait and tells her husband who it is. Hubby dashes out of the house at sight of the portrait. During the day her mother again notices the ad in the paper, visits the store to find the salesman who invited her out in Baltimore. Hubby again insists that she go out, which she does, and while they dine at a fine café, the poor wife waits at home while the dinner grows cold. Finally she falls asleep. Hubby returns and wakens his wife, who is very angry. But when he tells her he has been working very hard, she relents and carries him off to bed. Next day the portrait is hung in a position opposite her husband's place at the table. Hubby is furious, and when his wife leaves the room, hurls plates and numerous other articles at the portrait, dashing out of the dining room to the kitchen, where he secures a plentiful supply of eggs. Finally the bell rings and wife goes to the door to find her mother there. Mother enters and confronts her son-in-law who is much perturbed and wonders how the woman whom he has been flirting with and whom he had been out with both in Baltimore and New York should know his wife. Finally his wife invites them to eat and says: "Mother dear, do have something." Hubby is aghast and corrects his wife, who, after a hearty laugh, says, "Why, this is the only mother I ever knew." Realizing what he has done, Hubby finds it too much and dives through the window, leaving the two women in hysterics.