Whooaaa! Did you see that? Room...

Whooaaa! Did you see that? Room 703. Stephen. Lauren. The mechanical bull ride? You so know L.C.'s 18th birthday getaway to Mexico turned totally NC-17 once that "Do Not Disturb" sign hit the door handle, right? Yeah, who they kidding? And what is our other birthday girl, Kristin, thinking? Yes, Talan is smokin' these days especially with the new buzz cut but he's into Taylor. Leave them be, woman! Besides, hasn't she hooked up with half the O.C. guys on Facebook.com already? If Miss Kris don't keep those True Religion jeans zipped, her rep is gonna be as smeared as L.C.'s mascara after Steve-O headed back to San Fran. Oh, well, I guess Christmas break is over. Tear. Though I'm sort of amped, because that means next week, we may get more of the seniors and Alex's Jason-stealing scheming. Not to mention a chance to see the gang back in class. Because, honestly, this column is really just my online version of passing a note in homeroom, and I want to make sure these kids actually go to school.