Watch My Show: Brooklyn Nine-Nine's Dan Goor Answers Our Showrunner Survey

After writing many memorable Parks and Recreation episodes (including 2011's "Li'l Sebastian"), Dan Goor partnered with Parks boss Michael Schur to co-create the new Fox comedy Brooklyn Nine-Nine. Andy Samberg plays Jake Peralta, a hotshot cop who's good at what he does — when he's not irritating his co-workers or his new boss, Captain Ray Holt (Andre Braugher). We interrogated Goor on why Brooklyn Nine-Nine makes for arresting TV.

TV Guide Magazine: I have time to watch just one more show. Tell me why it should be yours.
Dan Goor: Right now, a gang of cartel members has kidnapped both of our families. If you read this article and don't watch the show, we will never see our children again. 

TV Guide Magazine: Who should be watching?
Goor: EVERYONE should be watching — we really want to see our families. Also, if you like comedy, police shows, comedy shows about police, Andy Samberg, Andre Braugher or laughing, you should watch.

TV Guide Magazine: What happens if we don't watch?
Goor: WE WILL NEVER SEE OUR CHILDREN AGAIN!!!

TV Guide Magazine: What's the best thing anyone has said or written about Brooklyn Nine-Nine?
Goor: "I loved your show (so much that I kidnapped your family)."

TV Guide Magazine: What's the worst thing?
Goor: "I kidnapped your family."

TV Guide Magazine: Who was right?
Goor: You're only right about this show if you say you love it. It should be noted that we are biased.

TV Guide Magazine: What's an alternate title for your show?
Goor: Our first choice was "Brooklyn 98." But then we thought we should ramp it up a little.

TV Guide Magazine: Give us an equation for Brooklyn Nine-Nine.
Goor: Σ((The Office)^{+ (Barney Miller)/ n) + π(The Wire)(Lonely + Island) or  2*Brooklyn49.5}

TV Guide Magazine: Come up with a premise for the spin-off.
Goor: Brooklyn 99: Miami 97. Jake and Captain Holt move to Miami, where they continue to catch bad guys and bump up against one another. But now, they do it while wearing pastels and listening to Cuban music.

TV Guide Magazine: What credit of yours would you prefer we forget?
Goor: After re-reading these answers, I would say this article.

TV Guide Magazine: Tell us something about your amazing cast.
Goor: Andy Samberg and Chelsea Peretti went to kindergarten together. For real.

TV Guide Magazine: If you weren't producing this show, what series would you most like to be an executive producer on?
Goor: Seinfeld. It's so good and all the work has already been done.

TV Guide Magazine:  Let's scare the network. Tell us an idea that didn't make it on to the screen.
Goor: Jake teams up with his high school chemistry teacher to become Brooklyn's leading meth manufacturer and dealer.

TV Guide Magazine: Finish this sentence: "If you like _______, you'll love our show."
Goor: The idea that we will be able to see our children grow into adulthood.

TV Guide Magazine: With what show would you like to do a crossover episode?
Goor: The Super Bowl. While working security at the big game, Jake thinks it would be funny to put on Peyton Manning's uniform. Due to the mix up, he's forced to actually play in the game, sustaining a massive concussion and two complex fractures. On the plus side, millions of people will watch. On the down side, Andy Samberg will no longer be able to walk or do simple math.

TV Guide Magazine: How will your show change the face of TV as we know it?
Goor: Again, if you don't watch it, we will never see our families.

Brooklyn Nine-Nine airs Tuesdays at 8:30/7:30c on Fox.

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