The Iceman's twin cometh back to Neptune, and although I may be the only one, I'm really glad he did. I mean, sure he was a total jerk to Veronica, but in the time since he dealt drugs and ditched her, she's been almost murdered by Aaron Echolls, shot at by PCHers and abandoned by Duncan, who left her to care for the child he had with another woman. Seriously, on paper Troy's infractions don't seem so bad, though Veronica summed up their current status quite nicely: "You are just water under the bridge... duplicitous, evil water." Anyway, it turns out that there is another iceman around, and he's an annoying frat boy who likes to rate girls with a numbering system. Charming. Loved Veronica's quippy comment about why he supposedly date-raped Maeby, er, Stacy and shaved her head: "You had to do it or your frat brothers wouldn't shave off your awesome Ryan Seacrest hair." She's so cool, and she tasered another guy. Don't mess with our gal. But her best moment of the night was the look on her face when she saw the hooker at her front door looking for Keith. No one ever wants to see their father hiring an escort, even though he had a good reason. I just love that she was concerned, but we also learned that Keith buddied up to the security guards at the hotel where Duncan was living so that he could keep an eye out for his little girl. They are an odd little family, but they really are sweet. And Keith probably would have let out a big round of applause after he saw his daughter's stunning melodramatic performance (nicely set to soap-opera-style Muzak) at the wig shop.
In other Neptune resident news, Logan is off the hook on his criminal case, but his girlfriend, who sweetly baked him a cake with a file in it, got shipped to Vermont after their half-naked romp in his hotel room. Madison ditched Dick for the more "mature" Sheriff Lamb. That doesn't seem like too much of a step up. I'd take the guy who played video games all day and who wished he could "write good" so that he'd have a chance to blow up the old shark stadium. OK, so he's not the brightest bulb, but at least you know what you are getting. Oh, and I hope that if my darling little show does get picked up next season, and if Veronica can somehow swing admission and tuition to Hearst College, that adorable tour guide, George Michael, er, Dean, will be back, too. Since the prognosis for Arrested is not good, I'd love to see its stars get some other work. Could Jason Bateman be a professor? Besides, as Wallace pointed out, Veronica's already made enemies at the college, so it really would be just like home. Angel Cohn
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