Question: Yo! I'm here to slap you out of your obviously Snapple-induced stupor and berate you for leaving the awesome Desperate Housewives off of your Top 10 list. It at least deserves to be rated over Everwood, no? — V.

Ausiello: Regular readers of this column know that I'm not crazy about what has become of Wisteria Lane since the show's promising pilot. Although last Sunday's episode marked an improvement (Gabrielle push-carting her assets over to Bree's garage was one highlight), the show continues to disappoint with its predictable plotting and third-grade dialogue. Everwood, on the other hand, seems to get better with each passing episode. The smartest thing Greg Berlanti ever did was gag that painfully earnest voice-over. The second-smartest thing he ever did was add Scott Wolf and Anne Heche to the cast. How freakin' fantastic are these two? Pretty freakin' fantastic.