Question: Wow, I was looking forward to you coming back from vacation so I could get a new scoop-filled column. Instead, you fill more than half of it with ego-inflating messages about how everyone missed you (Ask Ausiello 5/11). — Lori

Ausiello: That's a blatant lie. I went back and counted, and only 20 percent of last week's AA featured ego-inflating messages about how everyone missed me. The other 80 percent was pure, Grade A, USDA-approved, free-range meat.