Question: We are having trouble finding information on being a contestant on Survivor II. If you know anything about this, please let us know. We would greatly appreciate it! Thank you. — Hector Saldivar

Televisionary: I know something, Hector, but unfortunately I don't think it's what you want to hear.

You missed the deadline.

If it makes you feel any better, though, you're missing out on competing with somewhere around 60,000 other people to go suffer in the Australian outback. (Odds are you also won't have to chow down on witchety grubs, a type of root-dwelling larva and onetime Aborigine delicacy. Mark my words: someone will eat one or two of those over the course of the series.)

Had you thrown your name into contention, you'd have gone up against creative (or not so, considering how many there were) types who tried to call attention to their applications by tossing in Foster's beer, toy koalas, boomerangs and, of course, tapes of themselves in the buff.

If it's any help, and you like living vicariously, an Orlando, FL-based Survivor II applicant is charting his progress via an online diary and site. In the new age of everyman fame, we'll give this guy props for throwing in a diverting Web component.