OK, a note to all the TV programmers out there at the local ABC affiliates: Don't take your best show in years and run a weather advisory when people are trying to read subtitles that explain how Jin sold his soul to the Devil, I mean Sun's papa. I don't really care that it is going to snow in New Jersey tomorrow, when I'm way more concerned about the heat that is being generated on the island, and I'm not talking about that big burning raft. The smoldering looks and suggestive speak "Maybe we should get some rope, spend a Saturday night alone together and see what happens" between Shannon and Sayid is enough to set that whole damned jungle on fire. That, plus Sawyer getting his near-weekly chance to start a brawl, and that devastating glare Jin gave to Sun when he discovered she could secretly speak English phew, this show is better than a cardio workout to get my pulse pounding.
Was I the only one who caught Hurley getting into a car on some Korean TV show right before Jin took that little girl's puppy? The writers are getting sneaky about connecting all these characters. What does that mean? And how did Locke know that Walt destroyed his dad's escape route? What's up with that boy? Does he have mind-control powers? Does Locke have psychic abilities like that chick on Medium? Is Boone stupid enough to tell Sayid that he knocked boots with his own stepsister? Will Sayid be skeeved out? I want answers! OK, well. that's probably a lot to ask from Mystery Island, but an answer might be nice once in a while.
Let's face it: American Idol eviction night is just torture for everyone, from the home viewers who are subjected to an endless stream of highlight reels and recaps to the poor contestants who have to suffer through Ryan's drawn-out revelation of who gets to stay and who has to go. And it's just plain mean-spirited to make the losing contestants sing again. America doesn't want to hear them; they didn't get our votes because we didn't like their performances the first time around. Even Paula, the queen of unoriginal thought, sighed that she "couldn't stand Wednesdays." No big shock that Jared, Sarah, Judd and Melinda were sent packing. But Melinda pretty much blaming her ouster on the Idol producers for not showcasing her enough? That has rock-diva-in-the-making written all over it, and made this whole hour worthwhile.
How have I not been watching this show? There is an overweight, small-town guy with a wig, a possibly loaded shotgun and a hunting jacket who is a budding fashion designer. I can't believe I missed this. I am so rooting for him! Prior to this episode all I knew about the show was what I had seen on last week's SNL parody, and I have to say Rachel Dratch's impression of Wendy seems pretty dead-on. Her witchy ways even forced Damian to write from his sickbed to say: "Even the agony of a slipped disc couldn't keep me from this glam-and-slam-orama, and let me tell you, seeing Wendy Pepper go down was better than a handful of Percocets."
And I couldn't help but chuckle at the oh-so-subtle cameo by Bravo's formerly hot commodity, the Queer Eye guys. All the fashion was impressive, but as a Gap girl I was really excited by the commercial for Bravo's next "project" the return of my former addiction Project Greenlight. While the films they've produced so far aren't nearly as impressive as Runway's really funky and original ensembles, I'm still hopeful for the new horror version of the Matt and Ben brainchild, though I highly doubt there will be any shoe crises there. Anyhow, so glad that Jay won; not worried about the obviously talented Kara Saun finding work, but is Parker Posey really qualified to judge anyone on taste when her hair looks like the before pic in a shampoo commercial? Damian Holbrook was off sick tonight. Today's column was written by Angel Cohn.
Don't miss Damian Holbrook and Michael Ausiello's live minute-by-minute coverage of the Oscars on Sunday night.