American Idol My first laugh was courtesy of Simon Cowell's barely buttoned shirt, and the second snicker arrived when Ryan Seacrest

took notice of said shirt with a jeer. Or was it a leer? Eh, whatever. The best laugh came when Stevie Wonder was asked to review performance night and all he said was "I hope I gave them constructive criticism." Considering half of them severely butchered his music, he was far too kind. Then it was time for the overly dramatic adios. I know we were supposed to be "shocked" about Ace's appearance in the bottom three, but the guy was way off during his last two performances. Nobody has ever coasted through to the end of Idol based on looks alone, and unless he can really, really step it up, Ace will be gone soon. The stupid bear costume he wore during that ridiculous fauxmercial and his bow to the audience were reason enough to boot him. Paula Abdul shook her head and simply said, "I don't get it." Truer words have never been spoken. The real surprise was the absence of Kevin among the bottom three. C'mon people, Chicken Little is almost out on DVD, so you don't have to keep Kevin around any longer. Lisa should not have been in danger since she was great on "Signed, Sealed, Delivered," but I guess a Southern-fried sob story trumps a decent performance. At least she got a reprieve and hopefully will connect better with voters. Melissa's departure was no big deal  I actually expected her to go last week. She took it well and seemed to expect it herself. The end of the show was so rushed that Melissa's send-off song (the same one she mangled on Stevie night) was abruptly cut off. Now we'll never know if she finally got all the lyrics right.