Today's News: Our Take

Smallville Whoaaa! What is going...

Whoaaa! What is going on here? Lex is in a psych ward, Lana's cozying up to some guy with mad eyebrows from her physical rehab and there's a bunch of nuts out to kill Clark. Is this Smallville or Twin Peaks? Not that I'm complaining. After all, we are talking about the teen of steel. It's only right he be running around like a speeding bullet while the rest of his peeps are in peril. But, seriously, someone needs to talk to the writers about all the shirtless beefcake. That looney-bin weight-lifting scene between Jesse Metcalf's freak-hunter and Jonathan Taylor Thomas' meteor mutant looked like the outtakes from an Abercrombie & Fitch shoot. And it felt dirty.

Star Trek: Enterprise
It took me a bit to figure it out, but there is more going on here than just the bad theme song and Scott Bakula's Caesar 'do. Turns out, the ship's been star-jacked (like that one?) by these culty zealots and al read more


The upcoming soundtrack to Queer Eye for the Straight Guy will feature a new song from Duran Duran, as well as remixes of Sting's "Never Coming Home" and Elton John's "Are You Ready for Love." And there's apparently no truth to the nasty rumor that Jai Rodriguez will perform a cover of Placebo's "Without You I'm Nothing." But we'll find out for sure when the disk drops on Feb. 10. read more


Everyone else mocks poor Paris Hilton, so why not Mr. Blackwell? He's dubbed the Simple Life star No. 1 — calling her "the vapid Venus of Beverly Hills" — on his 44th annual Worst Dressed Women list. The grumpy old fashionista also nails Madonna and Britney Spears, lamenting, "Someone arrest the kissin' cousins of couture crime!" Worse yet, he likens Melanie Griffith to "a botoxed cockatoo" and Celine Dion to "Abe Lincoln in drag." Now, that's not very nice. read more


Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger are in talks to play cowboy lovers in Ang Lee's adaptation adaptation of the E. Annie Proulx novella Brokeback Mountain. The story chronicles the intense relationship between two Wyoming stockmen. Carson Kressley, meanwhile, is in negotiations to hang around the set and watch. read more


Friends will conclude its 10-year run on May 6 with what NBC is calling a "two-hour extravaganza," the network announced today at the TCA press tour in Hollywood. An hour-long retrospective will be followed by a one-hour series finale. Not to be outdone, Frasier will get similar treatment on May 13, when the 11-year-old sitcom returns to Thursday night for its own two-hour send-off. read more


In a fun bit of counterprogramming, NBC will air a three-episode Queer Eye for the Straight Guy marathon opposite CBS' Super Bowl telecast on Feb. 1. The network also announced plans to kick off its 2004-05 season in late August/early September, immediately following its Summer Olympics coverage. read more


Christopher Reeve will reprise his role as the mysterious Dr. Swann on Smallville April 14. He was originally slated to return for the show's season finale, but for some reason that's not happening now. read more


Rosie O'Donnell's troubled Broadway musical Taboo — which wasn't nearly as bad as critics would have you believe — will close Feb. 8 after 100 performances. "Taboo was by far the most fulfilling experience of my career," said the former talk show host, who will lose her entire $10 million investment. "Many lessons were learned, and so it goes." Koosh ball anyone? read more

Dumped by Trump

On last week's series premiere of The Apprentice, 16 overachievers handpicked by real-estate tycoon Donald Trump embarked on a 13-week job interview. The last man (or woman) standing lands a one-year gig as president of a Trump-owned company. The aspiring entrepreneurs have been divided into two gender-specific teams, competing at various business tasks. The losing team heads to the Board Room, where a player will be fired by Trump and ejected from the game. Here, TV Guide Online meets the reality show's first casualty, David Gould.

TV Guide Online: What was it like sitting face-to-face with The Donald?
David Gould:
Well, I actually enjoyed the whole process. I wasn't intimidated like I think some of the others were. I was hoping to have a more detailed, more drawn-out discussion, but I managed to get in a word here and there.

TVGO: Were you surprised to end up in the Board Room so soon?
I wasn't surprised to end up in the B read more


Sharon Osbourne revealed on her gabfest Monday that Ozzy's collarbone had to be replaced by a rod following his all-terrain vehicle accident last month in England. She also said that he nearly had to have an arm amputated. It remains unclear whether Ozzy's real-life ordeal will be featured on The Osbournes, which returns to MTV with five all-new episodes on Jan. 27. read more

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