Today's News: Our Take


SEX SELLS

The truth about hookers is out there, and former X-Files scribes Glen Morgan and James Wong are gonna try to find it. The producing partners are developing an hourlong drama for Showtime that delves into the world of high-end prostitution. Morgan and Wong have also pacted with NBC to pen a pilot script for a 24-like heist drama titled Den of Thieves. read more

SHORT CUTS

Billy Joel broke his wrist last week after falling at his home in Long Island... A musical version of Alice Walker's The Color Purple will make its Broadway debut in early 2005... Felicity grad Tangi Miller has joined CBS's The District in a recurring role as a district attorney. read more

WHEN BRIDEZILLAS ATTACK

One of Fox's Bridezillas has gotten loose and is wreaking havoc again. New Yorker Julia Swinton-Williamson, whose nuptials were featured last season on the Fox reality special, is suing the show's producers for $136 million. She claims they lied to her about the concept of the show — but not, apparently, the title. (In her defense, Bridezilla is a rather misleading title. I thought it was a show about a giant killer bride who stomps people to death.) read more

THE LATEST

Famed Las Vegas magician Roy Horn, one half of the iconic Siegfried and Roy duo, remains in critical but stable condition after getting mauled by a white tiger during a performance Friday night. "The doctors are encouraged that he will recover," says Horn's spokesman, "but it will be several days until the full extent of his injury is known." Horn, who turned 59 Friday, is on a ventilator and is responding to voice and touch. The prognosis for the Siegfried and Roy show, meanwhile, looks grim. Officially, the long-running spectacle has shut down until Christmas. Unofficially, there's talk the tragedy may force it to close for good. read more

Tarzan So those clever apes apparently...

Tarzan
So those clever apes apparently taught Tarzan (Travis Fimmel) how to crash through a thick pane of glass without getting all cut up. (And, I guess,how to get a nice, close shave in the jungle, too.) Isn't he supposed to be just a really agile, regular guy? That's it. No powers, and not from Krypton. And there was so much quick-cut editing during the acrobatic fight scenes that it could have been a shirtless Dennis Franz in a dirty-blond wig and I wouldn't have been able to tell.

Trading Spaces: 100 Grand
A hundred-thousand bucks and perky Paige Davis can't get two outfits for two days? I mean, even Marge Simpson gets to change her green dress and red necklace if she and Homer go out for the evening.

Two Plymouth, Mass., couples got 50 times the normal $1,000 budget each for this two-hour extravaganza. But that goes fast when you spend, say, $1,800 on an ugly, 19th century starburst mirror. At read more

Gilmore Girls Becomes a Work of Art


Art imitates art this November on Gilmore Girls when the kooky residents of Stars Hollow decide to host their own version of the popular California-based Pageant of the Masters, in which living, breathing people re-create classic and contemporary paintings.

"It's going to be our big town thing this season," says exec producer Amy Sherman-Palladino, who jokes that she's prepared to make up for any budget overruns by holding "a big Gilmore Girls car wash. Me and the staff are going to go out and wash [&#252berproducer] John Wells's car to raise money for Episode 7."

Details of the special installment are still being finalized, but this much we know: Lorelai will bring to life a Renoir painting, while Kirk (Sean Gunn) takes on the daunting task of playing God. "He's going to be Jesus in the 'Last Supper,'" laughs Sherman-Palladino, "and he takes it very much to heart, to the point where maybe he and Judas aren' read more

LOVE TROUBLE

Singer-actress-train-wreck Courtney Love had a packed calendar Thursday night. First, the Hole frontwoman was arrested for allegedly being under the influence of a narcotic after police found her outside a Los Angeles home she allegedly attempted to break into. She was booked and released after posting $2,500 bail. Hours later, Love was rushed to the hospital for an apparent overdose, according to the Los Angeles Times. There's no word on her condition. So, I guess this means she forgot to tape Scrubs for me? That's just great. read more

Is Jessica Simpson Really Dumb?


You have too been watching MTV's Newlyweds. Don't front! With their careers as pop stars on shaky ground, hunky 98 Degrees dude Nick Lachey and "dumb blonde" Jessica Simpson signed on for a reality TV show about their marriage. Some grumps called this a desperate grab for publicity. Well, maybe so, but Newlyweds is the second-highest rated cable show after Sex and the City. And it's just been renewed by MTV for a second season. Joe Simpson — Jessica's dad, personal manager and executive producer — is one proud papa. Even if the show's portrayal of his sloppy, doofy, primadonna daughter isn't very flattering.

"What's happening here is Jessica knows she's on camera," he insists to TV Guide Online. "Since she was a little girl, people have been calling her a dumb blonde, [so] she begins to assume the role that everybody expects of her. That doesn't mean that's who she is. It's a part of her personalit read more

EASY CELL?

Comedy Central has given the green light to TV's first animated "reality" show. The cable network has ordered eight episodes of Drawn Together, which puts famous cartoon characters like Captain America, Betty Boop and SpongeBob SquarePants in a Real World/Big Brother-type situation. "Anything adults can do on a reality show, we want our characters to do," exec producer Dave Jeser (The Man Show) tells Variety. "You haven't seen cartoons having sex or bulimia." Um, hello? What about Paradise Hotel? How quickly we forget. read more

Suzanne Somers on Facing Cancer


Back in early 2001, Suzanne Somers went on CNN's Larry King Live and revealed she was battling breast cancer. How is the 56-year-old actress's health today? "My health is good," she tells TV Guide Online. "I have two more years before I can go, 'Yippee!' But I'm feeling great."

A few years ago, Somers reconciled with her late Three's Company co-star, John Ritter. But, even after they'd put old showbiz squabbles behind them, they weren't very involved in each other's lives. Thus, before she publicly came out about her illness, Somers says her secretiveness caused tension and misunderstandings with people. "Nobody knew," she recalls. "I didn't tell anybody. I didn't want anyone to know. I didn't want to be thought of as sick.

"The CBS Morning Show had wanted the [Three's Company trio] to be on for a reunion, and I couldn't go, because I was so deep in my treatments and sick that I read more

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