Today's News: Our Take


Question: Why do you suck so ...

Question: Why do you suck so hard? You can't hold a candle to Matt Roush. Monkeys could do your pathetic job (if you can call it that). Do us a favor and kill yourself. — Phil, N.D.

Televisionary: Not true. I've held a candle to Matt on several occasions, but nowadays he has only to hear me strike the match and he's off like a shot. The man's got wheels for feet, I tell you.

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Question: Can you tell me who ...

Question: Can you tell me who played Lex Luthor's wife last season? Also, if you have a bio on her I would be thankful. — Michael D., Waterbury, Conn.

Televisionary: OK, Michael, here's what I got:

Emmanuelle Vaugier, who played the two-faced Dr. Helen Bryce on the WB's Smallville, was born in 1976 in Vancouver, B.C. She speaks fluent French and modeled in Japan before breaking into the entertainment biz. She's appeared on such shows as Highlander, Charmed and Higher Ground, and had a lead on the WB's short-lived My Guide to Becoming a Rock Star. She most recently showed up in USA's TV-movie charting the rise and fall of Heidi Fleiss.

On the big screen, you may have caught her in such offerings as Secondhand Lions and read more

Question: My roommate and I ...

Question: My roommate and I are arguing over when Jackass premiered on MTV. I say it was 1999 at the latest. He says 2000. Please prove me right! — Jeff, Marysville, Pa.

Televisionary: No can do, Jeff. Jackass debuted in October 2000 and went off the air in April 2002.

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DON'T TELL MAMA

NBC has lost its appetite for The Restaurant — at least for now. The network has pulled the low-rated reality soap from its Monday lineup for the remainder of May sweeps. Crossing Jordan repeats will likely air in its place. Rocco will return later this month, when ratings no longer matter. read more

REMEMBERED

Veteran actress Anna Lee, best known to modern-day audiences as Quartermaine matriarch Lila on ABC's General Hospital, died Friday of pneumonia. She was 91. Lee, who was paralyzed in a car accident more than two decades ago, appeared in more than 60 films, including The Sound of Music, Fort Apache and King Solomon's Mines. She was slated to receive a lifetime-achievement award at Friday's Daytime Emmy telecast. read more

The Real Helter Skelter Gang


As the new CBS movie Helter Skelter ignites renewed interest in 1969's infamous Tate-LaBianca murders — and in Charles Manson and his so-called "family" — TV Guide Online checked on the status of the real-life cult members. Manson himself did not participate in the ritualistic murders, but he sent his emissaries — Susan Atkins, Leslie Van Houten, Patricia Krenwinkle, Tex Watson and Linda Kasabian — to perform the actual crimes. Atkins, Van Houten and Krenwinkle are housed at the California Institution for Women in Corona, Calif. Tex Watson is incarcerated at Mule Creek State Prison. Linda Kasabian, who did not participate in the murders and fled the family immediately afterward, was given immunity for testifying. Here's the rundown on them all...

Susan Atkins, 52, has been denied parole 10 times and is eligible for a hearing in December. Atkins is a gray-haired matron who sings in the read more

DOINK DOINK

Law & Order has tapped acting vet Dennis Farina (Midnight Run, Get Shorty) to replace Jerry Orbach next season. As previously reported, Orbach is transferring to spinoff No. 3, Law & Order: Trial by Jury, which debuts on NBC at midseason. Although Farina's character is still being fleshed out, exec producer Dick Wolf tells TV Guide Online that the 60-year-old Crime Story star will be playing an "Italian cop who's an iconoclast... and a confirmed bachelor." Adds Farina: "He's going to be a little out of the ordinary." read more

The Swan's Tooth Lady Speaks!

We'll be the first to admit that, while we can't seem to tear ourselves away from it, we don't feel good about watching The Swan (airing Mondays at 9 pm/ET on Fox). Week after week, plain Janes undergo hours and hours of plastic surgery, only to come out the other end looking like members of a Pamela Anderson cult. But now that we've gotten a look at the gnarly choppers on recent also-ran Dawn, we're going to shut our mouths. By allowing this 33-year-old mother of five to smile without embarrassing herself or frightening anyone, the show actually has performed a public service. If only by ringing up the Indiana resident for a post-op interrogation we could say we were doing the same.

TV Guide Online: Since anger was one of your big issues, I feel obliged to ask — for the sake of my own well-being — um, are you in a good mood today?
Dawn:
[Reassuringly] Oh, it's not like that at all. I'm wonderful. Better than I've ever been!

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SIGNING OFF

Weekend Update anchor Jimmy Fallon broke some real news on this weekend's season finale of Saturday Night Live. The 29-year-old comic announced at the end of his Update segment that "This is my last show." read more

Rupert's Big Booty Call!

Survivor: All-Stars fans rooted hard for their beloved, bearded pirate Rupert Boneham. So it's no surprise fans cast 38 million votes to award him the $1-million prize on last Thursday's Survivor: America's Tribal Council special. Additionally, viewers named Rupert's shoe-stealing escapade in Pearl Islands as the top Survivor moment of all time. His showdown with best villain Johnny Fairplay was also picked as the reality show's best fight. Here, TV Guide Online reconnects with Rupe, who's reveling in his popularity and making big plans for his windfall.

TVGO: Congrats! You were a shoo-in to win.
Rupert Boneham:
I know, but I couldn't let myself believe it. In the back of my head, I kind of knew, but I was not going to let myself hope. I didn't want to walk out disappointed. It almost seemed greedy to even want more.

TVGO: Did you worry about your chances after learning which other players made the fans' final four? read more

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