With this chainmail/bondage-inspired red carpet look, Cyrus looks like she's on her way to audition for a pornographic parody of Game of Thrones.

Flower child in the house! Here's hoping no one in the front row was an allergy sufferer.

Attention, VMAs audience: Every breath you take, every move you make, Miley's boobs will be watching you.

Like a school uniform from the future, Cyrus' black-and-silver ensemble was one of her classier getups during the night.

Sorry, Miley, but we think you're about two months too late for the Gay Pride Parade.

Cyrus took off a bulky coat to reveal this silver swimsuit, which gives new meaning to the term "high-cut."

Caution: If you try to replicate this look, you should probably avoid going near open flames when wearing those pants.

All you need is some Saran Wrap and a few Easy Buttons to re-create Cyrus' most minimalist look of the night.

Believe it or not, this Fembot-ish Versace number, complete with mile-high go-go boots, was one of the more modest outfits Cyrus wore for her hosting gig.

Is there a glitter fabric shortage in Hollywood? It's tragic that there was only enough material for one arm and one leg on this jumpsuit. Fun fact: While changing into this outfit backstage, Miley actually flashed the home audience!

After dropping her album for free, Cyrus ended the night by announcing her surprise new gig as a spokesperson for Nike.