Today's News: Our Take


SHORT CUTS

Comic actor Dave Chappelle has signed a deal with Showtime to launch a series of comedy specials showcasing new standup acts... Nicole Kidman has been tapped as the new face of Chanel No. 5. read more

WILL MEGA WIN?

Just when we thought controversial Big Brother alum Will Mega had vanished from the pop culture landscape for good, the 31-year-old antagonist formally known as William Collins decides to run for Philadelphia City Council on the Education Party ticket. Mega is calling himself a "hip-hop political-activist candidate." I call him homeless in two years. read more

SundayAlias Ain't it just like...

Sunday

Alias
Ain't it just like a woman to stab you in the lung, stand back and watch while you get kicked down an embankment, and then tell your buddies to come pick your carcass up out of the dirt? Well, it's just like this woman, anyway. And ain't it just like a guy to dream about her instead of the devoted wife who's teleporting around the hospital room while he hovers near death? Oy... love.

Oh, and it's a bummer about Sloane. I was really hoping to see him disarmed.

The Practice
Eugene and Jamie fight over a toothbrush — yup, they're a real couple, alright. And I've got to hand it to James Spader, who always keeps me guessing as Alan Shore, a guy who never met an ethic he wanted to get to know. I never figured him for a guy who'd have such a tough time making the first move on someone (Tara, in case you weren't watching) who really wanted him to. He's creepy and he's kooky. And I'd sa read more

Meet Bernie Mac's Lil' Dictator


Since Jeremy Suarez co-stars on The Bernie Mac Show and lends his voice to Disney's Brother Bear (opening today), you'd think the child star gets whatever he wants. But that's not exactly the case for this spunky kid.

"I'm trying to convince my mom to get me a monkey," Suarez says. "She [keeps saying] no, though. My favorite animal is the little capuchin monkey. They are so active and silly."

Why the obsession with this particular pet, especially since he already has a dog and a snake? "Who doesn't want a monkey?" the pint-sized actor retorts. "I would train it to operate [things]. I saw this school where you send your monkey. They can train it to use microwaves, and they potty train it, too.

"That's what I want to do," he adds, excitedly. "He'd help me clean up my room. All I do [for chores] is read more

Scott Foley's Scrubs Spoiler!


Scott Foley exits NBC's Scrubs next Thursday when his dolphin trainer character Sean accepts a plum research gig in Hawaii. But as the beloved Felicity grad reveals, that doesn't mean his on-screen romance with Sarah Chalke's Elliot will flatline. "We decide that we're going to try a long-distance relationship," he tells TV Guide Online. "At the last minute, Elliot says, 'We can do it! We can make it work!' It's really sweet."

Still, the couple's long-term prognosis appears grim given that Foley is only signed on to do one more episode — tentatively scheduled for February. (He's currently appearing on Broadway in Richard Greenberg's morality tale The Violet Hour.) And despite rumors, Foley says there was never any talk of him coming on board as a permam read more

TOTAL RECALL

Alias spy Sydney Bristow is turning to an unlikely source to help her fill in those missing years: David Cronenberg. The acclaimed Dead Ringers director appears in an upcoming episode as an "experimental researcher" who employs a radical therapy to help Syd get her memory back. Okay, so long as he's not an OB-gyn. (For more "TV News" scoop, pick up the current issue of TV Guide magazine.) read more

VOTE NOW, OR ELSE!

Just a heads up, folks: Time is running out to vote for your favorite stars in TV Guide's Greatest Moments of 2003. So, if you have yet to cast your ballot, click here and get busy! You might even win a trip to Hollywood! (Had it been New York, I would have let the winner treat me to an expensive lunch. But no such luck.) read more

GROUNDED

Former Dynasty diva Joan Collins and supermodel Christie Brinkley were among the celebs on board the Concorde as it made its final passenger flight from New York to London this morning. "The fact that it is going to be phased out is quite, quite tragic," says Collins. "I am very, very honored to be on the last flight. I am glad we made the cut." Meanwhile, poor Linda Evans is stuck flying Jet Blue. read more

BAN LIFTED

It's official: The Motion Picture Assoc. of America has agreed Thursday to partially lift its controversial screener ban. As part of the compromise, the MPAA will allow studios to mail VHS copies (not DVDs) of movies to Oscar voters only. Members of all other groups — including the folks who hand out the Golden Globes and Screen Actors Guild awards — will be forced to see movies in theaters or posh screening rooms. (Poor dears.) The MPAA views the screener crackdown as a necessary evil in its war against piracy; the studios say it makes it more difficult for smaller films to get recognized during the crowded awards season. read more

THE BAND PLAYS ON

The History Channel is in talks to acquire rights to rebroadcast HBO's acclaimed World War II miniseres Band of Brothers. read more

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