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My Wife and Kids
EpisodesSeason 5 Episode Guide
33 Episodes 2004 - 2005
Episode 1
Fantasy Camp
Tue, Sep 21, 2004 30 mins
Part 1. Michael is obsessed with the prospect of going one-on-one with Michael Jordan at a Las Vegas basketball fantasy camp. Wayne Newton has a cameo in the episode, in which the entire Kyle klan joins Michael in Vegas. Slobodan: Nick Von Esmarch.
Episode 2
Fantasy Camp
Tue, Sep 21, 2004 30 mins
Michael goes one-on-one with Michael Jordan in the conclusion of a two-part visit to Las Vegas. Rev. Al Sharpton also has a cameo as a minister at an all-night wedding chapel; Alan Thicke plays a magician who makes Jr. disappear (but can't bring him back); and Dom Irrera plays a hotel waiter whom Michael tips (exorbitantly) to show him Jordan's suite.
Episode 3
Child-Care Class
Tue, Sep 28, 2004 30 mins
Jr. and Vanessa (Brooklyn Sudano) insist that Michael and Jay attend a child-care class for grandparents. Not surprisingly, it doesn't go well for Michael, who gets into a diaper-changing contest with Calvin (Rasta). Jasmine: Ella Joyce. Mrs. Lane: Kim Coles.
Episode 4
Class Reunion
Tue, Oct 5, 2004 30 mins
Michael and Jay's high-school reunion is coming up, but Michael wants none of it. Then he's challenged to a "dance-off" by an old break-dancing rival (Katt Williams), who also happens to be the first guy ever to have kissed Jay. Meanwhile, bullies target Franklin, so he devises a secret weapon. Calvin: Rasta. Sharon: Susie Castillo. Toni: Dot Marie Jones.
Episode 5
The Fellowship of the Baby
Tue, Oct 12, 2004 30 mins
All of a sudden, Jr. becomes really smart. All he has to do is touch his newborn son. Meanwhile, Kady catches Claire sneaking in late and blackmails her. Vanessa: Brooklyn Sudano. Franklin: Noah Gray-Cabey.
Episode 6
Poker Face
Tue, Oct 19, 2004 30 mins
Jr. invites Jay to Michael's weekly poker game. The other guys don't like it. Meanwhile, Kady's beginning to resent Jr. Jr. for taking the "baby" spotlight away from her. Angeline Boudreaux: Rolonda Watts.
Episode 7
The Proposal
Tue, Nov 9, 2004 30 mins
Kyle-on-Kyle karaoke: Jay's Diana Ross vs. Michael's James Brown. Meanwhile, Jr. wants to propose to Vanessa (Brooklyn Sudano), but he can't get a chance to do it.
Episode 8
Restaurant Wars
Tue, Nov 16, 2004 30 mins
Jay opens a soul-food restaurant on the same block as a Chinese restaurant owned by the very aggressive Annie Hoo (Lauren Tom). A food fight soon breaks out. Eddie: Peter Kwong. Calvin: Rasta.
Episode 9
The Wedding
Tue, Nov 30, 2004 30 mins
Jr. and Vanessa set a date for their wedding, with the Kyles planning an elaborate one that might have made a royal couple blanch. This does not please the bride-to-be (Brooklyn Sudano). Meanwhile, Kady's gaydar tells her something about Claire's boyfriend, Tony (Andrew McFarlane).
Episode 10
Careful What You Wish For
Tue, Jan 11, 2005 30 mins
Jay notices the attention Jr. is lavishing on Vanessa and decides that Michael's ignoring her. Meanwhile, Franklin decides he's too short, when he can't meet a roller coaster's height requirement.
Episode 11
They Call Me El Foosay
Tue, Jan 18, 2005 30 mins
Jr. turns Michael on to foosball and no one can turn him off---and an extremely annoying "foosaholic" Michael turns out to be. Who can stop him? "El Foosay" (Franklin), a recovering foosaholic himself. Franklin: Noah Gray-Cabey. Calvin: Rasta.
Episode 12
Study Buddy
Tue, Jan 25, 2005 30 mins
Jay's psychology professor (David Leisure) doesn't like her. Bad news, considering that the final's coming up. Also bad news is Michael's determination to be her "study buddy." Meanwhile, Kady fears that Franklin's interested in another girl, a fellow brainiac named Emerson (after Ralph Waldo). Emerson: Jillian Henry.
Episode 13
Sweetheart's Day
Tue, Feb 1, 2005 30 mins
It's "Sweetheart's Day" at the Kyle household. That means presents for the ladies (Jay insists on it). So Michael devises a plan to determine how much to spend. Of course, it gets him into trouble.
Episode 14
Silence Is Golden
Tue, Feb 8, 2005 30 mins
Jay and Michael spend a weekend at a meditation retreat, although Michael isn't exactly a willing participant. And when it's over, Jay gives him the silent treatment. Bodhi: T.J. Thyne. Nancy: Jennifer Elise Cox.
Episode 15
The Bahamas
Tue, Feb 15, 2005 30 mins
Part 1 of two: The Kyles are vacationing in the Bahamas and Michael just wants to relax by the pool. Not likely. For starters, an annoying acquaintance (David Alan Grier) shows up. Then Jr. and Vanessa fight because he wants to shirk his parental responsibilities. And Franklin's "archenemy," Franceso Mumfordi, is on the island.
Episode 16
The Bahamas
Tue, Feb 22, 2005 40 mins
Conclusion. Michael and Jay are stranded on a remote island with the annoying guy (David Alan Grier) that Michael had blown off. Too bad: he's a survivalist, and he won't help them. Meanwhile, Claire discovers that there's alcohol in those Coco Mocos that she has been eating; Jr. takes "time off from my responsibilities" with his new friend, Dave (Marcus Patric); and Franklin confronts his "bubbleganger" (as Kady calls him), Francesco Mumfordi (Noah Gray-Cabey).
Episode 17
The Remodel
Tue, Mar 1, 2005 30 mins
Jay decides that it's time to remodel the garage to make it more comfortable for the baby, and Michael decides to do the work himself. "It's the Garage Mahal to me," he says. Meanwhile, Kady wants to write Franklin a love letter but doesn't know what to say. Woody: Dom Irrera.
Episode 18
Michael Joins a Gym
Tue, Mar 8, 2005 30 mins
Michael can't fit into an old pair of jeans, so he starts dieting and heads to a gym. He's not fun to be around. Nor is Franklin, who has flunked an astrophysics exam. Daryl: Terry Crews. Salesman: Casey Lee.
Episode 19
Celibacy
Tue, Mar 15, 2005 30 mins
Jay tells Michael that they'll only have sex "on a mental level" for six months because it will make their lovemaking more exciting when they resume. Michael is skeptical, to say the least. Meanwhile, Franklin and Kady symbolize their love with a plant, and Jr. complains to Michael that Vanessa wants too much loving. "She's a sex machine," he tells his sex-starved dad.
Episode 20
Jr.'s Cartoon
Tue, Mar 29, 2005 30 mins
Jr.'s cartoon, a thinly disguised version of "My Wife and Kids," attracts the interest of ABC, so Jr.---and his agent Michael---visit the network for a negotiating session. Meanwhile, Claire threatens to break up with Tony (Andrew McFarlane) unless he can "bring some excitement" to their relationship. Fernando Torres: Carlos Gomez.
Episode 21
Michael's Sandwich
Tue, Apr 12, 2005 30 mins
Michael has a golf date at Pebble Beach and he's making a "masterpiece" of a sandwich to eat on the flight. But he keeps getting interrupted by various Kyle crises, and if he doesn't finish it fast, he'll miss the plane.
Episode 22
Graduation Day
Tue, Apr 26, 2005 30 mins
Everything that can go wrong, does go wrong as Jay gets ready for her college graduation, including a makeup mishap, a shrunken gown---and a black eye. Meanwhile, Franklin learns honesty is not always the best policy when Kady asks him if the dress she's wearing makes her look fat.
Episode 23
Michael Sells the Business
Tue, May 3, 2005 30 mins
Michael dreams about "the Michael and Jay phase" of his life when he gets an offer to sell his business. Meanwhile, Kady and Claire squabble over the amount of time the other spends in the bathroom. Katt Williams returns as Michael's old nemesis Bobby Shaw.
Episode 24
R.V. Dreams
Tue, May 10, 2005 30 mins
It's vacation time again for the Kyles. The destination: the Grand Canyon. The mode of transport: Michael's new Wonder Van 6000. It'll be a bumpy ride. Salesman: Clint Culp.
Episode 25
The 'V' Story
Tue, May 17, 2005 40 mins
In the series finale, Jay reads about a 67-year-old woman who gave birth, so she orders Michael to get a vasectomy. Not surprisingly, he has reservations. Meanwhile, Tony (Andrew McFarlane) wants to do something "to get God's attention" at Bible camp, so he asks Claire to make him a hat. Tisha Campbell-Martin directed.
Episode 26
null
Thu, Dec 13, 2018 30 mins
The Kyles are headed to The Grand Canyon.
Episode 27
null
Sat, Dec 29, 2018 30 mins
Tony feels incredibly guilty because he finds Clare "incredibly sexy."
Episode 28
The Baby Pt.1
Thu, Jan 31, 2019 30 mins
Jr. and Vanessa announce that they want to have the baby at home with the help of Summer Breeze, a midwife whose natural childbirth methods include the whole family's participation.
Episode 29
The Baby Pt.2
Thu, Jan 31, 2019 30 mins
Jr. and Vanessa announce that they want to have the baby at home with the help of Summer Breeze, a midwife whose natural childbirth methods include the whole family's participation.
Episode 30
Childless Class
Fri, Feb 1, 2019 30 mins
Michael fails a child-care course for grandparents, so Vanessa and Jr. refuse to let him babysit his grandchild.
Episode 31
Bahamas Pt.2
Thu, Feb 7, 2019 30 mins
Michael and Jay find themselves stranded on the Bahamas during a family vacation.
Episode 32
Backout
Thu, Apr 11, 2019 30 mins
Michael decides to spend some time with the kids, whether they like it or not.
Episode 33
Child-Car Class
Sat, Jul 20, 2019 30 mins
Jr. And Vanessa insist that Michael and Jay attend a child-care class for grandparents. Not surprisingly, it doesn't go well for Michael, who gets into a diaper-changing contest with Calvin.