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My Wife and Kids Season 4 Episodes

31 Episodes 2003 - 2004

Episode 1

From Dummy to Daddy

Wed, Sep 24, 2003 30 mins

Part 1 of two. Michael and Jay react predictably (which is to say not at all well) to the news that Jr. has impregnated his girlfriend, Vanessa. But Michael is determined to make a man of his son. "I've got only nine months to take him from dummy to daddy," he tells Jay. "I've got to teach him that there's no free ride." First, he gives him a job at his trucking company. Brooklyn Sudano joins the cast as Vanessa (taking over from Megan Good). Tony: Andrew McFarlane. Franklin: Noah Gray-Cabey.

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Episode 2

The Sweet Hairafter

Wed, Sep 24, 2003 30 mins

A golfing buddy (David Alan Grier) of Michael's turns him on to a hair-growth pill, and Jay insists that she and Michael see an estate planner. (These two storylines are connected.) Meanwhile, Kady's jealous because Claire has volunteered for a Big Sister program and is mentoring a disadvantaged girl (Kennedy Rue McCullough).

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Episode 3

Jr. Executive

Wed, Oct 1, 2003 30 mins

Jr. learns what it means to be the boss's son when he begins working at Kyle Trucking. Meanwhile, Claire's been spending a lot of time in a homework chat room, so much that Michael wonders just what homework she's doing.

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Episode 4

Jay Goes to School

Wed, Oct 8, 2003 30 mins

Jay decides to go back to college and get her psychology degree. Michael is opposed, of course. He says it will disrupt the house and it does: Jay psychoanalyzes everybody. Meanwhile, Jay gives Jr. his baby crib for his own baby, but his friends John and Mike (Damon Wayans Jr., Michael Wayans) have their own plans for it.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 4 image

Episode 5

Meet the Parents

Wed, Oct 15, 2003 30 mins

Vanessa's parents (Ella Joyce, Rasta) have an agenda when they meet Michael and Jay for the first time. Meanwhile, Michael fears that Claire's becoming a "clothesaholic." Vanessa: Brooklyn Sudano. Claire: Jennifer Freeman.

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Episode 6

He's Having a Baby

Wed, Oct 22, 2003 30 mins

Michael, suspecting that Jr. lacks parenting skills, challenges him to care for a fake baby (actually, a water balloon) for a week. Meanwhile, Kady wants to know how babies are made. "You're over the stork story, huh?" Jay asks. "Way past it," she replies.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 6 image

Episode 7

The Funeral

Wed, Oct 29, 2003 30 mins

Jr. has been getting friendly with a coworker named Larry (Sean Whalen), who ups the friendship ante considerably when his grandmother dies. Meanwhile, Claire sprains her ankle tripping over Kady's skateboard, so Michael makes Kady Claire's "personal assistant." Jr.: George O. Gore II.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 7 image

Episode 8

Ultrasound

Wed, Nov 5, 2003 30 mins

Vanessa (Brooklyn Sudano) has her ultrasound, but doesn't want to know the baby's sex. Neither does Jr. Only Michael wants to know. Meanwhile, Kady is enamored of a young dancer named Smilin' Willie (Elliot Cho). This upsets not only Franklin (Noah Gray-Cabey), but Claire as well. It seems that Willie has a crush on her, and won't leave her alone. Jasmine: Ella Joyce. Calvin: Rasta.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 8 image

Episode 9

Marathon

Wed, Nov 12, 2003 30 mins

Jay's training hard to run a marathon; Michael not so hard ("I'm on my regimen---it's called the eat, drink and be merry regimen"). Meanwhile, Tony (Andrew McFarlane) is feeling incredibly guilty because he finds Clare "incredibly sexy."

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 9 image

Episode 10

While Out

Wed, Nov 19, 2003 30 mins

Michael and Jay go out for the evening without reciting "the rules" to Claire. That means it's party time, and the party animal turns out to be Claire's usually pious boyfriend Tony (Andrew McFarlane).

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 10 image

Episode 11

Michael's Band

Wed, Nov 26, 2003 30 mins

E Street Band saxman Clarence Clemons guests as a jazz performer who went to school with Michael, who suddenly claims he's a pianist (albeit a rusty one). He'll get a chance to show it. Meanwhile, Kady and Franklin's sister Aretha are vying to be lead singer in Franklin's band, so the young man has a choice to make.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 11 image

Episode 12

The Lady Is Not a Tramp

Wed, Dec 10, 2003 30 mins

Tony (Andrew McFarlane) returns from a "purification exile" that followed his drunk-and-naked escapade, and Michael finds condoms in Claire's backpack. Naturally, he suspects linkage. Meanwhile, Jr. and Vanessa (Brooklyn Sudano) get a dog---a male they name "Lady"---as a "dress rehearsal" for parenthood. Jr. will soon demonstrate just how much rehearsal he'll need.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 12 image

Episode 13

Of Mice and Man

Wed, Dec 17, 2003 30 mins

There's a mouse in the house (and doggerel in the script). Is Michael man enough to catch it? Hardly. "He's a genius," he admits, "an evil, conniving genius." But there might be a better mousetrap in the Kyle household: Claire, who's inadvertently wreaking havoc on any wildlife she encounters.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 13 image

Episode 14

Moving on Out

Wed, Jan 7, 2004 30 mins

Jr. decides it's time to move out of the garage and into a place of his own, a "humble abode," he calls it. "Very humble," Michael notes on his first inspection. Just how bad is the neighborhood? "He could go out for a quart of milk and end up on the carton," says Jay. John/Granny: Damon Wayans Jr. Jasmine: Ella Joyce. Calvin: Rasta. Realtor: T'Keyah Crystal Keyma'h. Dexter: Lamont Johnson. Vanessa: Brooklyn Sudano.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 14 image

Episode 15

Candy Wars

Wed, Jan 21, 2004 30 mins

It's candy-sale time at Kady's school and Jay won't help because she's dieting. So Michael steps in. The plan is for father and daughter to bond, but Michael's competitive nature soon overwhelms all else. "I'm afraid she's being trampled underfoot in your mad dash to victory," says Franklin (Noah Gray-Cabey), who devises his own sales strategy. Kady: Parker McKenna Posey.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 15 image

Episode 16

Jr. Sells His Car

Wed, Feb 4, 2004 30 mins

Jr. finally finishes restoring his old car---and then he sells it. He'll need college tuition for his baby-to-be, he tells his proud parents. Meanwhile, Franklin's sick of being "special," so he goes to Michael for advice and is told: "dumb down." Eddie Hoo: Peter Kwong. Annie Hoo: Lauren Tom.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 16 image

Episode 17

The Anniversary Present

Wed, Feb 11, 2004 30 mins

It's the Kyles' 19th anniversary, and Michael and Jay are busy one-upping each other in the gift department. Meanwhile, Franklin's teaching the gastronomically challenged Claire how to cook so she can prepare a fancy French dish for the anniversary dinner.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 17 image

Episode 18

Illegal Smile

Wed, Feb 18, 2004 30 mins

Jay wants to look younger and Michael wants to lose his "devious look" before a traffic-court date, so they visit a dermatologist, and it's smiles all around. Big Guy: Lou Ferrigno. Officer: Kevin Knotts. Dr. Tortoni: Joey Vassallo. Judge: Susan Peretz. Bailiff: Free Brooks.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 18 image

Episode 19

Outbreak Monkey

Wed, Feb 25, 2004 30 mins

The NBA's LeBron James has a cameo in an episode in which all the Kyles catch the flu. Well, everyone but Michael, who goes to absurd lengths to stay healthy because he doesn't want to miss James' NBA debut at Madison Square Garden, for which Michael has scored courtside tickets.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 19 image

Episode 20

Empty Nest

Wed, Mar 3, 2004 30 mins

Part 1 of two: None of the kids is at home, giving Michael and Jay a chance to reminisce (via clips from past episodes) about their brood: Claire, Kady and Jr.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 20 image

Episode 21

Empty Nest

Wed, Mar 3, 2004 30 mins

The conclusion of a two-part highlight episode features clips of Michael's "minor glitches" and Jay's concern about her weight. Lou Rawls has a cameo as a physician.

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Episode 22

Calvin Comes to Stay

Wed, Mar 10, 2004 30 mins

Vanessa's parents have a fight and her father (Rasta) needs a place to stay, so he lands on the Kyles. He's an unusual houseguest, to put it mildly. Meanwhile, Franklin (Noah Gray-Cabey) has cracked the lottery. Unfortunately, he must rely on Jr. to buy the ticket that he has calculated will win.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 22 image

Episode 23

Calvin Goes to Work

Wed, Mar 31, 2004 30 mins

Calvin (Rasta) goes to work at Kyle Trucking---well, not work, exactly, but Michael does feel as though he must hire his future in-law. Meanwhile, Claire has a science paper due on cold fusion, a topic about which she knows little and cares less. So she asks Franklin (Noah Grey-Cabey) for help.

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Episode 24

Romantic Night

Wed, Apr 21, 2004 30 mins

Michael has plans for a romantic getaway with Jay, but when Jr. foils that, they settle for a romantic evening at home. Hurdle No. 1: getting the kids out of the house. And that turns out to be the easy part.

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Episode 25

The Director

Wed, Apr 28, 2004 30 mins

Michael's so excited about a basketball game he's watching on TV that he accidentally tapes over Kady's first steps. What to do? Reenact them, with the reluctant assistance of Franklin (Noah Gray-Cabey). Stevie: Taylor Negron.

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Episode 26

The Maid

Wed, May 5, 2004 30 mins

Betty White guest stars as the maid Jay hires to replace her while she's away in Florida. Jay might have it tough when she returns, because the woman's an excellent cook and seamstress. She's also uncommonly adept at auto mechanics and TV repair. She can even beat Franklin (Noah Gray-Cabey) at chess.

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Episode 27

Hand Model

Wed, May 12, 2004 30 mins

Michael doesn't think that modeling's a wise career choice for Claire, but when an agent (Carole Davis) tells him he has the perfect equipment to be a hand model, he thinks it's fine for him. Meanwhile, Kady's spending time with a girl named Rachel (Liliana Mumy), making Franklin very jealous.

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Episode 28

What Do You Know?

Wed, May 19, 2004 30 mins

It's "game night" at the Kyle house, but it isn't exactly fun and games when the couples play "What Do You Know?" "What You Don't Know" would be more like it. "There's this weird energy here," moans Michael. Vanessa: Brooklyn Sudano. Jasmine: Ella Joyce. Calvin: Rasta. Tony: Andrew McFarlane. Franklin: Noah Gray-Cabey.

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My Wife and Kids, Season 4 Episode 28 image

Episode 29

The Baby

Wed, May 26, 2004 30 mins

Part 1 of two. Vanessa (Brooklyn Sudano) is more than a little bit pregnant. In fact, she's a week overdue. She wants a natural childbirth at home, presided over by a new-agey midwife named Summer Breeze (Kelly Coffield). Fat chance of that happening. Meanwhile, Claire suspects Kady of pilfering her perfume and lipstick.

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Episode 30

The Baby

Wed, May 26, 2004 30 mins

Conclusion. Following Vanessa's false labor (and the chaos it caused), Michael scripts a "game plan" for the real thing. "This has to work like clockwork," he declares. Meanwhile, Claire and Kady, having made up, go off on a shopping spree together. Vanessa: Brooklyn Sudano.

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Episode 31

Epiosde 21

Sun, Mar 29, 2020 30 mins

Jr.'s Cartoon, a thinly disguised version of "My Wife and Kids," attracts the interest of ABC, so Jr. and Agent Michael visit the network for a negotiating session. Meanwhile, Claire threatens to break up with Tony.

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