The Shield
So when Rawling wants to undermine the DEA plan with Antwon, she goes to Vic and Shane. She's certainly talking to the right guys to undermine just about anything... including her. Then there's the situation Dutch and Claudette face — a girl's coming-out party that ended with her dad getting shot to death. (Well, I assume it ended there, anyway — I really doubt anyone popped another beer after that happened.) Let's face it, though: That's just B-story, and this week all we care about is A. Boy, do we get it, too, with an impressive Lem fighting his way out of a three-on-one scrum at Gusano's place when he definitely would've woken up dead had he lost. "Nice job, Windtalker," Vic later tells Gusano, mocking his simplistic cipher system for phone numbers. Second week in a row this show has made me laugh rather than squirm. (Of course, watching the stoned girl vomit blood a moment later covered the squirm, too.)

"We just busted Bonilla, snagged Antwon. I think I just bought myself a little cover," Rawling tells Vic when he advises her not to make another seizure after our party-shooting B-story suddenly joins up with A. "Or we can quit while we're ahead," he replies, his words falling on deaf ears. See, here's the thing: When Vic says you're going too far, it's a good bet you are. This is the guy who killed another cop in the very first episode of this show, after all. Sure enough, Acevedo and those in power sell her out and she's on her way to the exit. (And kudos to Dutch for turning down the "company yes-man jellyfish" role when offered her spot.) So how warped is it that I'm able to see this ending as good news? Glenn Close decided not to return to the show next season, and I was afraid they were going to make the melodramatic choice and kill her off. At least now the possibility remains for her to come back for an episode or two in the future. I mean, c'mon — didn't you love what she did with the place? — Michael Peck

Fire Me... Please
While the first episode was sort of novel and offered a few chuckles, this one was just tedious. The obnoxious laugh track and the people doing ridiculous things get old real fast. Can I give this show a pink slip? Please? I did learn that if you want to drive your coworkers nuts, constant singing, humming and whistling will do the trick. I still don't understand how these small stores stay in business with so many employees and so few customers. But in retrospect, I think it's probably best that there aren't too many customers involved in these inane pranks. This means that there's less likelihood of their making fools of themselves, like employee Kelly, who says stupidly that Cat is "like school in the summer — no class." Oh yeah, that's mature. But I guess that fits in with this show. — Angel Cohn

Blow Out
You know, I really feel for Jonathan. Stuck with two bangin' salons, greatish bone structure and a hottie sister with the Pussycat Dolls on speed-dial, it makes perfect sense that he spent so much time tonight bitching about how rough he has it. Poor guy. He probably has too much money and fame, too. Please. Of course, it's not all golden for hair's best friend. He does have to deal with that spikey-tressed tool who's designing his product line and a girlfriend who seems more into the freebie 'do and flowers than she is into the actual dude attached to them. Oh, and let's not forget the borderline unethical shrink who allows cameras into his weepy sessions. That is just so wrong, you know? As is Jonathan charging his gal-pal Jenn a thousand bucks to go from platinum rocker ho to a brunette "nugget," as he would say, although based on his comments about it having been a while since he "did her," I'm guessing she scored some sort of deep discount — wink, wink — we don't know about. What I do know is that trouble is brewing in a big way at both the Beverly Hills and West Hollywood shops now that Jon Boy's picked his team for the New York Fashion Week gig. You see that girl Kim's face? She is not happy about being left behind. Maybe he can cheer her up with a jar of that there Dirt hair paste. God knows it would make my day if I could find a place that sold the damn stuff! — Damian J. Holbrook

Queer Eye
Last week's Red Sox episode was gimmicky sap, but this week's twist on the makeover day was sweet and funny: Five kids, five gays and a straight guy go to the mall. It's no wonder adorable Italian couple Paolo and Silvia haven't had a date in three years. How the heck do you get the neighbor's teenage daughter to baby-sit 2-year-old quintuplets? No matter how fab they are, these five have their hands full. First, during the ritual sweep through their style-troubled home, the guys got quite a whiff of parenthood, and we got pretty close to seeing Jai's culture-ific breakfast. We also saw Carson almost drop a kid after getting a swift kick in the crotch. As for the clothing Paolo's getting to replace his wardrobe of sweatpants — after spending half of today covered in coffee stains without realizing it, I'm really coveting that Smart Care fabric. I'm also sweating everything Ted and Thom bought them at Williams-Sonoma (Help! I have succumbed to the product placement!). Is it me, or did having Paolo give Kyan a spa treatment seem kinda cheap? All the other straight guys get their own facials and manicures, and what does Paolo get? A bad haircut. He looked so much better with those longer, sensitive-Euro locks. I'm always frustrated by how little time they spend on Thom's interior design work. The whole magical-transformation thing is old, guys; I really want to see how he does it. Or have him do my apartment. Finally, it's time for the simple romantic date at home while the kids are whisked away to the totally un-kid-friendly W Hotel suite. (What a wasted cameo by Amy Sedaris! Exchange some barbs with Carson or something while you're plugging your homemade cupcakes.) Silvia is thrilled to tears, even when Paolo goofs up that silly spa-treatment chime trick he was taught (which would make me laugh in an actual spa, too). The fairy godmothers have delivered the happily-ever-after, and all the potential mothers in the audience have resolved to be really careful with those fertility drugs. — Sabrina Rojas Weiss

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