High School Reunion
From what I've seen so far, there are two main activities for Texas' Round Rock High School class of 1993 — for the girls, it's giggling incessantly and for the guys it's holding beer bottles while pretending to be cool and occupied. I have only three questions for the gang:
To Laura "The Drama Queen": Did you really put mustard-covered marshmallows in Jeralyn "the Wallflower"'s underwear back in the day? (If so, you should still apologize.)
To T.J. "The Redneck": You said that you want to appear not as close-minded as you used to be. So do you think that instantly moving out on your gay roommate helped that cause? (And to the producers, you guys like to mix it up, dontcha?)
Finally, to Lenny "The Geek": Why do this to yourself again, buddy?
I thought that Adriana was gonna lose it and spill her guts — and not just her lunch this time — about snitching for the FBI. That certainly would have been something for the girls to talk about at their next-film club meeting. And Steve Buscemi as cousin Tony B. seems like a human eel (in Miami Vice duds). Anyone who'd call Tony "fat" and Paulie "Grandpa Munster" has to have something up those white linen sleeves.
Sydney's red wig is back! And if the plane lands, the bomb on board will go off! Wait, that sounds familiar. Yeah, that reeks of Speed, but who cares because Ricky Gervais (The Office) is much better than crazy ol' Dennis Hopper. The mental stability of Sloane's wannabe psychiatrist is certainly in question as well, considering she just slept with the object of her professional obsession.
Curb Your Enthusiasm
In Larry David's world, even success is failure. Mirroring the plot of The Producers, Mel Brooks had actually cast David in his musical to make it fail so he could get away from its constant pressures. And for a little texture this season finale featured a multilayered story with a lost watch, an angry flight attendant, an off-putting photo of George W. Bush, a purse snatcher, a sex expert, extra spicy food, the vagaries of hotel tipping, OCD and appearances from Jerry Seinfeld and Anne Bancroft. Larry's head must hurt, because mine sure does.
Saturday Night Live
Ben Affleck's giddy hosting turn is a perfect example of the difference between a good show and a painful one. If that week's star isn't having fun, it seems contagious either way. Some highlights:
Average Joe commercials
How much exactly is Seal getting every time NBC uses "Love's Divine" from his new CD for an Average Joe spot? If it's a nickel, he'll still get about a million bucks.
In this new series a young, quippy girl named Jaye (Caroline Dhavernas) is given cryptic instructions from inanimate objects that eventually lead to good results. Yes, it sounds like Joan of Arcadia, but it's on Fox so that means in the premiere episode Jaye's sister is inadvertently outed and the phrase "take a dump" is used. You won't hear that on CBS; well, unless maybe Dan Rather is caught off guard.
Joan of Arcadia
I seriously doubt that I was the only who was waiting for the elevator to break down when Will (Joe Mantegna), his partner and a suspect entered it with a majorly pregnant woman. And, of course, it did. And, of course, she went into labor. And, of course, she gave birth in a speedy fashion. Also, Joan is getting considerably snippier with the Supreme Being, as in this takeoff on an old Judy Blume book. "Are you there, God?" she said with great frustration "It's me, Joan...and you suck!" N-i-i-ce.
Countdown with Keith Olbermann
Ya just gotta feel for William Hung. Our ultimate American Idol reject — the "She Bangs" guy — appeared at the end of the program to "sing" three snippets from his forthcoming CD, which will be out April 6. Wow, that's fast. I can only imagine those recording sessions:
Hung: "Should we do more than one take on those first five songs? I think I may have been off-key once or twice."
Record producer: "Really? Didn't notice. Don't worry it. C'mon, we can finish this puppy before lunch."