If I were in public relations, my idea of the ideal "religious" leader would be someone who embodies the three M's: messiah, martyr and missing body. The obvious example is a certain carpenter from Nazareth, whose timeless tale of sacrifice and resurrection is of Biblical proportions. No one understood this more clearly than bearded 4400 Center svengali Jordan Collier, who shrewdly ripped it off in last night's tale of his demise. Despite Maia's terrified warnings of his impending death and NTAC's grudging efforts to find his shadowy predator, Collier was picked off by a sniper at the 4400 gala reunion. Desperate to save his mentor, healer Shawn massaged Jordan's chest and howled like a coyote. Unfortunately, this sincere attempt to suck the bullets out of Collier's lungs failed miserably. But hark, there's a twist! Shortly after kicking the farm (or "buying the bucket"), Jordan mysteriously disappeared from his casket. Could a "Shroud of Jordan" be far behind? Frankly, this whole assassination thing smacks of marketing; Collier is likely somewhere safe and shaven, just waiting for the right moment to pull a resurrection. (My own paranormal powers tell me L. Ron Hubbard is rolling in his grave in an ascot-gnawing tizzy because he didn't rip off the idea first). There's only one snag: Kyle. That he tossed the rifle into the pond suggests he pulled the trigger. But who is triggering him? Speaking of triggers, if you have any affection for your spleen, don't cross baby Isabelle.
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