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AND PARIS THOUGHT SHE HAD PROBLEMS

The busboy who found — and kept — "Margaritaville" singer Jimmy Buffett's lost cell phone confessed to cops that his pals (clearly Mensa members all) may have used it to crank-call Bill Clinton. The accused added that he and his posse checked out the address book while smoking pot, which we could have figured out for ourselves: Clear-headed people know it'd be easier to get a rise out of Hillary.

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The busboy who found — and kept — "Margaritaville" singer Jimmy Buffett's lost cell phone confessed to cops that his pals (clearly Mensa members all) may have used it to crank-call Bill Clinton. The accused added that he and his posse checked out the address book while smoking pot, which we could have figured out for ourselves: Clear-headed people know it'd be easier to get a rise out of Hillary.