Nicole Kidman Nicole Kidman

Nicole Kidman went to "hell and back" coping with husband Keith Urban's alcoholism in 2006, just three months into their marriage.

"We were thrown into his alcohol problem... and that was big," Kidman told Parade. "We became the closest we could become, because we had to bare our souls. We did 10 years of marriage in three months. You go to hell and back with this - when the addiction takes control of the life, it's terrifying."

It's been two years since Urban check out of rehab, and while the couple is in "a place of actual peace right now," they continue to work on their relationship every day.

That place of peace was happily and emotionally punctuated this summer with the birth of their daughter, Sunday Rose. Already mom, with ex-husband Tom Cruise, to two adopted children, Isabella, 15, and Connor, 13 - who were raised in Scientology, she reveals - Kidman, 41, had previously suffered miscarriages and now gets "raw and emotional" when it comes to her new bundle of joy.

"I cry even thinking of her," she said. "But they are tears of joy. Because I suppose I never thought I would get to have it. To have been given it so late in life - I'm so ready for it."

So protective of her she is that Kidman refuses to "introduce" Sunday, who looks like Urban, to the world by selling baby photos like so many star moms before her have done.

"I'm like, 'I don't want to. I want her to stay out of that,'" she said. "Maybe that will wane as she gets bigger, and I'll be easier with it. But for now, I'm still keeping her in a bubble."